Reality Is Wrong, Dreams Are For Real
by AwesomOButters
Summary: Stan ends out dreaming about Kyle, and everything from then on is questioned. Kyle keeps something to himself about what he heard that day he came over, can Stan ever get the answers he needs? Will everything ever be okay again? Rated M for cursing and sexual scenes! Some dark themes in later chapters! I do not own South Park, and I do not own any of the characters mentioned!
1. Chapter One

**I do not own South Park and I do not own the characters mentioned!**

 **Hope you enjoy! (:**

* * *

"Stan! Hurry up or you'll be late for school."

Sharon Marsh' voiced called for the second time up the stairs, this time sounding a little bit impatient, which seemed about right because half an hour beforehand there was plenty of time, but now time was pressing and she swore no movement had been heard from her son's room, even now she heard nothing, so she gave in and made her way up the stairs and to her son's bedroom door.

"Stanley, I'm not going to keep calling up the stairs."

She spoke before she opened his door just in case he was up and getting changed she could at least give him that bit of warning... It would've worked if he had been doing just that, but the small curve under the bed covers showed exactly where he was, making her way closer she placed her hand against his shoulder, and it caused him to shift a little in his sleep.

"Come on now."

"Yeah."

Stan's muffled voice came, he slowly turned and lay on his back, his breathing a little shallow and his face as pale as the snow outside, and upon opening his eyes Sharon straight away noticed how glazed they looked, her immediate response was to press her cool hand against his forehead, and just as the thought crossed through her mind she spoke.

"Oh sweetie you've got a fever, must have come on in the night you was perfectly healthy yesterday."

She managed to point out, Stan closed his eyes momentarily before shifting himself a little so that he could sit up, once he did he instantly regretted it.

"Mom, I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Stan don't move."

Sharon replied rushing out the bedroom she headed for the sink, a bowl normally used for essentials was quickly emptied and she returned to Stan..

"If you are going to be sick do it in there, I'm going to get you some water and then I'm calling your school."

After she left Stan shifted once more, feeling the dizziness override him he pushed himself forward hanging his head over the bowl, that's when his stomach shifted and he threw up, it was the one thing he hated, his throat now burned but at least he felt that bit better for how long he couldn't bring himself to think about, so he remained over the bowl, making sure that was the episode was over.

His mother had returned with his water and took the bowl away leaving him to rest, it took him no time at all to return to sleep, until his stomach started to turn again, he woke up and automatically shot for the bathroom, his head in the toilet this time, and once he finished he lay down on the cool floor and fell asleep.

Nothing disturbed him this time, his sleep must have been enough to make his fever go down, and his stomach start to normalize, he even found himself dreaming about school.

More hours ticked by and Stan finally came to, somehow he had been returned to his own bed, which was much better than a hard floor but still, he felt too warm, he kicked off the sheets and glanced towards the window, the moonlight greeting him... How long had he been out for? He turned over and reached for his clock and twisted it so that he could read the time.

8:45pm

So he had spent this Friday sleeping, at least now it was the weekend, and even if he still felt like rubbish he could at least rest without worrying too much about school.

Pushing himself up he made his way out of his room, he still felt a little out of it so he slowed down as he reached the stairs, he made his way down making sure that he held on, especially when he got to the bottom.

"Hey you, how you feeling?"

Sharon questioned from her place on the sofa, Randy seated on the far side meant forwards.

"Welcome back to the land of the living."

"Feeling a bit better now thanks."

Stan replied dismissing his father's words, he made his way over and squeezed in the gap between his parents, Sharon dropped her arm across his shoulder and held him close, his response was to snuggle up and drop his head against her, it was comforting, and even as late as it was it was nice to be able to move to another room and stay there without the need to throw up...

"Want me to fix you anything?"

Sharon asked glancing away from the tv momentarily, Stan shook his head, the thought of it made his stomach twist... That little bit of normality didn't last very long now did it? He didn't even feel hungry and it was safer to refrain from eating for now anyway.

"Your friends came by to check on you."

Randy informed him, taking another sip from his beer.

"Said they had some homework for you from school to drop off, Kyle wanted me to wish you a get well, Kenny did too."

Randy continued giving him as much information that he could remember, more so what he deemed the most important, or as Stan thought as much as he could be bothered to relay back to him, which he didn't really mind because at least he told him, normally after a drink he wouldn't even remember what he had been doing an hour beforehand.

"What time was this?"

Stan asked him, not moving himself from his mother's embrace.

"Yesterday after school finished."

Randy replied finishing the last of his beer off, Stan now moved himself away from his mother and he furrowed his brows, his eyes were on the beer, how many of those had he drank already?

"You mean today right?"

"It's Saturday Stan."

"What? Why didn't you wake me up? I've missed a whole two days."

Stan stood up and made his way for the stairs, and he carried on up before either of them could argue their point, of course in the back of his head he knew why they never did, but still it was enough to irritate him… why did he have to be ill now? Heading into his room he grabbed his phone from his coat pocket and sat himself down on the edge of his bed finding his energy had depleted rather quickly..

3 missed calls

4 new messages

Opening up the missed calls there was one from Kenny and two from Kyle, even though he couldn't have helped it either way he still felt incredibly guilty.

Next he went for the messages.

All from Kyle.

Three of them had been from Friday.

'Dude where are you? You'll miss the bus.'

-Kyle

'I tried to stall the bus, sorry dude.'

-Kyle

'Ill drop your homework off later, hope you are okay?'

-Kyle

The last text had been sent tonight, fifteen minutes ago to be precise.

'I really hope you are okay, getting worried and I really miss you!'

-Kyle

That text made his heart sink and his guilt increase, never before had be gone this long not speaking to him, heck even seeing him, they had been inseparable even when there had been an argument there was still some form of contact, so naturally he replied.

'I'm feelin ok, and I miss you too, Dad said you'd been over.'

-Stan

He sent his reply and lay down on his bed pulling the covers up to keep himself warm, the room lit up and his phone buzzed.

'Yeah, wanted to see if you really was okay, I mean two days is serious, and after school yeah, but he wouldn't let me see you said you was still sleeping.'

-Kyle

'I slept right through, I still believed it was Friday! Cant believe they left me to it, even if I was ill they could have checked up on me, made sure I could still wake up.'

-Stan

'Dude! That was borderline morbid! But seriously how are you feeling? I mean what was it?'

-Kyle

'Lol I know but it's true! And no idea it came on so sudden just couldn't move without feeling like I was going to either pass out or chuck up.'

-Stan

'Well if your feeling better ill bring you your homework, at least I get to see you!'

-Kyle

Stan grinned to himself, the thought of it was the best thing he had heard since waking up.

'Sure ill see you tomorrow. Goodnight!'

-Stan

'Cool, can't wait.. Night Stan!'

-Kyle

Dropping his phone noisily on the side he turned himself over, which he instantly regretted when his head started spinning, it was unreal, one minute he felt fine, the next he was having another relapse, one weekend he had been looking forward to and he was spending it in his bedroom sleeping... He just wanted to get it out the way and done with so he could get back to normal..

Closing his eyes he drifted off instantly.

"Stan? Want me to make you feel better? I may not be very good but I can try my best, especially because you need to feel good, I never like seeing you like this."

Kyle's voice was low, and he had not made eye contact with him, his heart was beating quick, it felt as if it was going to jump out of his chest he just stared at him, silently watching and waiting.

"Stan? Will you let me do this for you?"

He purred and Kyle placed his hand against Stan's leg, his eyes watching his own movements, and Stan watched him too, what was he doing? And why was he letting him do it?

His mind must have been racing off because he hadn't noticed when the red head had undone his trousers, and he didn't even notice when he had pulled them down leaving him covered by only his boxers...

Kyle's hand brushed against his dick, and Stan pulled himself away, he went to protest, to question him to try and understand what was happening, why his best friend was touching him in such a way, why he was saying such things to him... But his voice... It was lost, he couldn't speak, that was when he started to panic, his breath was quickening and his hand went to his chest, trying to calm himself down...

"Stan?"

He closed his eyes.

"Stan?"

He covered his ears.

"Stan?"

He jolted awake, sweat felt like it was pouring from him and he looked towards the source of the voice.. Green eyes met his blue hues and he swallowed hard...

"Kyle?"

The red head cocked his head a little, a mix of worry and confusion adorned his features.

And then Stan felt himself blush.

That was the first time in his whole life that he had ever had such a dream...

And the first time that something had made his heart flutter like it did...

And it was the first time he had ever questioned himself about how Kyle was making him feel just by looking at him the way he was... There was no way that it could mean anything, he had been sick, his fever had been high so that just means his imagination is in hyperdrive… yeah that's exactly it, or was it something else? His mind rushed off and there was nothing he could do to stop himself from thinking about it, it might have been a fleeting dream, but lord knows it's not being forgotten any time soon.

Stan was speechless.

He had just missed his best friend that was all it was, it didn't mean anything, and it never would. And that would be what he would continually tell himself.

"Stan are you there? Or are you still asleep? I brought your homework, your Mom said I could come straight up, she did also say that I couldn't wake you up, but you looked a bit distressed… and uh…"

Stan had been pulled back to the reality of his situation, his eyes widened a little at Kyle's hesitation.

"Was you dreaming about me?"

Stan sat himself up properly, shaking his head as he did so, laughing it off he shook his head some more.

"Nah dude sorry, I uh, can't really remember you know how it is when you wake up sometimes and forget everything."

"Oh, okay."

It was a short response, but as he hoped Kyle dropped it and the subject changed instantly, either way he was still curious as to why Kyle thought that he was, had he maybe heard him say something in his sleep? He knew he did talk in his sleep sometimes, but that being said, anything from that dream could turn out bad… oh great, now he was starting to panic again.. one good thing.

He was feeling like himself again.


	2. Chapter Two

Kyle had been over for more than two hours now, the pair had decided to get their school work out the way, Kyle had almost finished his, but thought it best to wait for Stan to get his finished, that way there would be more time to do whatever they wanted before it was time to go back to school, it always worked, and it saved getting detentions.

"Since there is no school tomorrow did you want to stay over at mine?"

Kyle's voice came from the bottom of the bed where he had been sitting silently, Stan glanced up and before there was any answer Kyle quickly cut back in this time meeting Stan's gaze.

"I mean if you are feeling up to it."

"No school?"

Kyle nodded he forgot to tell him that there had been an extension on the weekend.

"Yeah, for some reason the teachers are having all sorts of meetings and such, so we all get the day off, pretty cool huh?"

Kyle smiled wide, and Stan couldn't help but smile in response, there was no way he could ignore that, he always could bring a smile to his face no matter how his mood had been prior.

"So?"

"I'll ask my Mom, but that should be okay, I am feeling much better anyway, as long as you don't get ill that is."

Kyle chuckled and shook his head, at the same moment he tugged at his green ushanka and pulled it free from his head, he must have been warm because some of his red curls were sticking to his forehead, he heard him whisper a 'That's Better' and then he continued with a response.

"Even if I do, it's totally worth it, I've missed you so that doesn't bother me."

Kyle told him as honestly as he could, and he was right, there would be nothing that would stop him from seeing him, even if tomorrow he came down with whatever Stan himself had been suffering with he would take it, he would not regret a thing, he was not like that and he never would be, as stupid as it sounds he didn't care.

"Believe me dude, you won't be saying that if you do."

Stan replied with a grin, Kyle's head dropped a little but his eyes never tore away.

"Never stopped you sharing before Stan."

"What? You always choose to come see me when I'm at death's door, how can I help but give you whatever it is?"

"Exactly."

Now the start of the conversation had been confusing Stan, but now, Kyle's simple response confused him even more, had he missed something? Oh that better not happen again, he was sick of being stuck in the dark over things..

"That makes no sense at all."

Kyle had gone back to his schoolwork, so his attention had shifted for a few seconds, it was Stan voice that broke him away, and when he did he turned his body completely, crossing his legs over he dropped the homework on the bed and leant back.

"That's the point, it makes no sense, I always share with you, no matter what it is, and you always share with me, anything and everything no matter how unimportant you believe it to be right? I'm just saying that's the way it's meant to be, because we are super best friends after all."

Now that did leave Stan more confused than he could even imagine, his brows had furrowed tightly and his arms dropped into his lap, he looked away from Kyle for no less than three seconds, returning his gaze almost instantly as if he had been searching for a way to respond.

"Are you saying that I've not been sharing something with you?"

"Yes."

Kyle's response was quick and to the point, it was exactly what he was saying because it was exactly what he was doing, and Kyle only knew this because he had walked in at the right time, but Kyle himself had been hiding something from Stan, but that something he had promised himself to hide away and never bring to the surface because everything would be put on the line, and when the line would break so would everything else, he could tell that Stan was confused, and it was understandable since Stan had been out of it at the time, still that was no excuse, he had to know some way or another.

"Like what?"

"You tell me."

Kyle said, but as soon as he said it, he waved it off.

"Let's leave that for another time."

Before Stan even had a chance to continue the discussion his Dad opened the door, causing both boys to look his way.

"You boys need anything?"

Randy questioned openly, leaving either one of them to answer, Kyle shook his head and smiled softly in response and Stan thought for a second, not that he was really wanting anything anyway.

"Hey, where's Mom?"

Randy leaned against the door frame, his arms crossed.

"She went to take your sister out."

"Oh, well is it okay if I stay over Kyle's tonight? I'm feeling much better and there's no school tomorrow."

Randy gave them both a nod.

"That should be fine, as long as your parents don't mind Kyle."

Randy knew there would be no problem, because it had become a ritual every weekend since they were in kindergarten, it just made him sound a bit more involved in the decision, which Stan picked up on a lot, especially more recently.

"It's fine."

Kyle told him and Randy nodded his head for a second time, that was confirmation enough, and then he left.

Both Stan and Kyle must have remained at his house for a further two hours finishing off their work and having a chat about what Stan had missed on Friday, and it was nothing much it was school and nothing really extreme happened, not recently.

"When was the last time you spoke to Wendy?"

Stan had been packing things into his bag ready for the sleepover, so the sudden break of silence distracted him enough to drop the bag to the floor, cursing under his breath he picked it back up and slung it over the back of his desk chair, that question was a little random, but he shrugged it off and fell silent for a moment… When was the last time he had spoke to her? A week? Maybe two? He wasn't exactly counting.

"I think about two weeks why?"

"What would you do if she broke up with you? I mean how would you feel about that?"

Kyle pressed, watching Stan trying to fold his sleeping bag up.

Once again Stan stopped, leaving the sleeping bag where it was he sat himself down on the chair and let his mind wander, he would never push a question away from him, unless he didn't know the answer, and honestly right now, he really had no idea, he had not exactly thought too much about it, that was when his mind turned again.. he had completely forgot about Wendy! Oh god! His dream! Did he just unintentionally cheat on her? No that was stupid wasn't it?

It was just a dream.

There was no way he could have helped it.

"I'm not sure dude, what's with all the interest in Wendy anyway?"

"No reason."

It was not easy to miss that there was something on his mind, and maybe he could press him on that fact a little later, but for now, he wanted to get sorted and get out the house, some fresh air would be perfect, and a change in scenery would be even better.

Just before leaving Kenny had text Kyle asking him where he was, and after Kyle had told him Kenny requested that they both went to his, Stan didn't mind at all, so dropping everything off at Kyle's and greeting his Mom and Dad they both headed out once more, this time to Kenny's, wading through the trash on the driveway Stan knocked on the door, and then the door opened.

"Oh hello boys, come on in, Kenny's in his room."

Stuart told them both, stepping aside from the door to let them pass, normally even at this hour he would have been drunk, so to actually catch him when he was sober was certainly new, not that either of them would complain, it was not really their place to either.

Kenny's door was open slightly, Kyle gave it a quick knock and Stan pushed it open, the two of them stepping through and into his bedroom, where they found the blond pulling the hood of his parka down from off his head, his eyes instantly meeting the two of them from across the room.

"How you feelin'?"

Kenny questioned Stan, and Stan felt as though he should have been asking Kenny the same question, he looked himself like he was ill, his face was pale and he looked as though he had gone without sleep for days, but then again he never removed that coat unless he really needed to so that might have been a big contribution to that.

"Much better thanks."

"Good."

Kenny crossed the room and leant between both Stan and Kyle, pushing the door to a close, he then turned on his foot and dropped his arms across both their shoulders, leaning only part of his weight on them, not that it would make much difference since he had always been the skinniest.

"What did you call us over for?"

It was Kyle's turn to speak, and Kenny smirked, pulling them both over to his wardrobe.

"Well for one, I wanted to see if Stan was okay. Two, I have something to show you."

He told them letting them both go he pulled at the door and opened it up, the first thing Kyle noticed was how empty it was, there was nothing more than a shirt and a box which lay on the ground, Stan noticed too and after a moment of waiting for more they both glanced up at Kenny, who was still wearing a mischievous smirk.

"It gets better."

Kenny told them, bending himself down he opened up the both and revealed to them what was inside, several beers, and bottles of scotch, Stan and Kyle both shared a look of confusion and Kenny laughed.

"I took them from my Dad, he was passed out drunk at the time so my opportunity rose, and well I know how you both wanted to see what it would be like to get properly drunk, I thought I would treat us all."

"Kenny? That's enough to give us alcohol poisoning."

Kyle said sounding a little shocked, Kenny looked a little deflated at Kyle's reaction automatically shutting up the both so that he could close the door and make sure his father didn't walk in at the wrong time.

"We don't need to drink all of it."

"I'm up for it."

Both the red head and blond looked to Stan who was still eyeing up the box, he wasn't feeling one hundred percent yet, but maybe this would be the best kind of medicine, Kenny seemed to have perked up at Stan's response because his smirk had made a come back, Kyle on the other hand was scowling..

"Dude, you're still recovering, you can't be serious."

"Like Kenny said, we don't need to drink all of it, besides, he did go to the trouble of collecting it for us, would be a shame to waste it right?"

Stan looked to Kenny asking for his support on this one, and Kenny nodded, turning his attention to Kyle.

"Two against one Kyle."

Kenny told him, his brow raising, and silence formed between the three of them, Stan cocked his head slightly and smiled softly, his attention fully on Kyle just as Kenny's was, puppy eyes always made him give in, and he could tell that it was working because Kyle's scowl had disappeared.

"Pretty please, it will make me really happy."

Kenny said to him, making sure that he fluttered his eyelashes as he spoke.

Kyle sighed.

He had been defeated.

"Fine! But we can't do this at my house."

"Don't worry, I've got it all figured out."

Kenny said as he rushed to grab his phone, pulling it out he dialled a number into it and pressed it to his ear, he listened to the tone for a few moments before the voice he expected answered him.

"It's a yes. Yeah Kyle is in too. Nah won't be a problem, see you soon."

Putting the phone down he dropped it on his mattress.

"Who was that?"

Kyle questioned.

"Cartman's Mom is away until tomorrow night so we can go over there."

"What? No, I'm out, I'm not getting drunk around that fat asshole."

Kyle immediately called out, waving his hands once, Stan could understand why, he was not exactly someone who could be trusted at the best of times, so to be able to trust him when they had plans to drink was even more the reason not to do it, in fact it was putting him off it too, but then again…

"Just us four?"

Stan asked Kenny, who shook his head.

"Butters is coming too, he was ungrounded yesterday, and it will spread the alcohol a little more."

"Still no! I'm not doing it."

Kyle added once more, this time folding his arms over his chest, he was more than pissed off, he just wanted a simple evening Cartman free, in fact he wanted every single day to be a Cartman free day, but no, he was digging his heels in.

"Kyle? Just this once?"

Kenny asked, hoping that there would be some way he could change his mind, although he never really had much power to do so before so there would be no way that now would be any different, Kyle shook his head.

"Just for an hour or two?"

Kenny added.

Kyle shook his head again.

"No."

"I'll give you five dollars."

"Kenny you don't have five dollars."

"I'll give you five dollars."

Stan interjected, leaving Kyle shocked, he looked towards him not expecting him to respond that way, was he really wanting to go that badly he was willing to pay him.

"Dude, no."

"Five dollars and if Cartman steps out of line too many times, I'll personally kick his ass for you."

Now that was sounding more like it, Kyle was still unimpressed with Stan's approach, but still he gave into him, although if he would have just asked him any other way he would have given in anyway, they were super best friends, and Kyle had told himself he was going to look after him certainly after his weekend.

"Fine. I give up, honestly though I don't like it."

"None of us do, but it's the only way we can get away with it."

Kenny replied, and it was true, although Kyle's mind did sway to the fact that they could just leave it and not even do it, hell even wait until they were old enough to purchase the stuff that way there would be no come back from it…

This was not going to end well, he just knew it.

 **Hope you enjoyed! (: Let me know what you think.**

 **More soon to come!**


	3. Chapter Three

The three boys all helped to carry the weight, Stan and Kyle only needed to pop back and grab their bags, Kenny took most of the weight in his own since he didn't have much more to pack than the normal items, Stan's bag was crowded enough as it was so the additional cans of beer made his bag stretch a little more than normal, and Kyle's back did the same, he swung it around so that he could catch it on his back and the two bottles of scotch that were inside clanked together and he paused momentarily.

"There's no way I'm walking out here without giving us all away."

Kenny had already put his bag on, so when Kyle was pointing it out he made his way over to him, grabbing one shoulder he forcefully turned him around so that his back was to him, Kyle didn't protest, he may have looked a little confused but still he accepted it, so Kenny continued, he opened up the red heads bag, taking one of the bottles of scotch out he rearranged the other, moving it so that some of Kyle's clothing would stop the two bottles from knocking each other, and either causing them to break or give them away.. once he was happy with his adjustment he placed the other scotch back into Kyle's bag and closed it up for him, holding the handle he tugged it up once and let it go, it dropped silently and Kenny smiled to himself.

"Thanks."

It was all that Kyle said, and it was all that needed to be said, and that was it, once they had everything they needed and were confident they could leave they did just that, the three of them walking next to each other on the way to Cartman's and even though silence between them continued, it was comfortable.

It was Kenny's turn to knock the door, he gave it two hard knocks and the three waited for a response, and when it came the three of them found their jaws dropping and their eyes widening.

"Hey there guys."

Butters had answered the door from what all three could tell he was wearing nothing but his boxers and a rather petite looking black apron that had a matching hat, Stan was the first the break the silence, and cut through the initial shock.

"Butters, what the hell are you wearing?"

That was maybe the right question, although there was a dozen more that at about the same moment rushed through his mind, like why was he wearing that in Cartman's house? And was Cartman allowing him to, there had to be some logical explanation but then again even if there was did he really want to know what it was.

Butters seemed to recoil, his hands grasping tightly at the bottom of the apron his eyes following his own action, then he looked back up his eyes first looking into Kyle's, and then into Kenny's and finally he got back to Stan and he answered his question.

"I uh.. well, this.. this right here is a costume."

Stan could tell not only by his response but by the way he was fiddling with his hands that he had been caught off guard, although he should have at least known that this outfit was not appropriate, but then again it was Butters and if Cartman had anything to do with this it was obvious he would have talked him into it somehow, telling him some bullcrap, Butters was way too gullible.

"You look like you should be working at Raisins."

Kenny made sure he let him know that, he didn't care how it came across, he just wanted to make sure he got the truth across to him, he at least was nice enough to save him the trouble of answering.

"You going to let us in?"

Butters nodded at Kenny's question and stepped aside, the three of them entered and Butters closed the door behind them, the warmth of the house became clearer when they got closer to the couch.

"Eric, he told me to send you downstairs."

Butters said, Stan and Kyle both shared a look and Kenny made his way for the basement door, opening it he made his way down, after several seconds passed them by Stan and Kyle followed.

Stepping down the first thing that Stan noticed was how dimly lit it was, maybe that was because of the towels that were draped over some of the lamps down their, or because the main light was turned off, either way he still caught sight of Eric at the back of the basement dropping something into an ice cooler.

"Cartman, why is Butters wearing that?"

Stan questioned out loud, unimpressed with him, although that was ritual, anything that he done always ended out the same way, he was unimpressed and possibly hated him even more than he does already if that was possible to do.

Eric dropped what appeared to be ice cubes, and turned himself towards the rest of his 'friends' who were in turn looking towards him, and so he frowned, was it not obvious enough.

"He lost a bet to me, he lost the bet, he becomes a slave, isn't it obvious?"

"For sex?"

Stan shot back, and the genuine shock that rushed across Cartman's face would have been amusing if he had not have been curious himself, Kenny must have lost interest because he was crossing the room to the back where Eric stood, he opened his bag up and emptied the beers into it, continuing his own little things.

"No not for sex, I ain't no fag so shut it, you too jew."

Eric spat in return.

"What? What did I do?"

Kyle frowned and tugged his bag from off himself, dropping it down on the couch he shook his head and ignored the male, taking out the scotch he placed them down on the table.

"I could give you a list."

Eric responded, but it was now obvious everyone had lost interest in their 'greeting'.

"Shut up fatass and help with the beers."

Stan said dropping his own bag to the floor, Eric huffed once and crossed the room, now normally he would have been pissed off with a direct order to do something from a fag like Stan, or even the name calling because he was just big boned, so there was no reason for him to call him such a terrible name… he passed it off, he wanted to do this just as much as everybody else.

"BUTTERS!"

Everyone in the room had not been expecting the sudden outburst, so each of them jumped just as much as the next, Kyle held his chest passing some evils towards the brunette, Stan was taking a few breaths and Kenny was looking wide eyed, each of them glanced towards each other and shook their heads, and let him get on with it.

"Butters you can come down here now! And hurry up!"

Eric was a little quieter this time around, and as soon as he had finished his words there came a noise from upstairs followed by the small blond yelp of joy and then he appeared on the stairs.

"Can I get dressed yet?"

It seemed as though Eric was thinking about it because he didn't respond to him straight away.

"Fine. But that does not mean you are no longer my slave, is that clear?"

"Whoopie!"

Butters called out as he ran back up the stairs, he disappeared out of sight and Stan couldn't help but grin, even with how cruel Eric was to him he never lost faith in anything, he always seemed to be cheerful and even when he was down he still had some kind of cheer to him, it was admirable, and Stan could never imagine what it would be like to be that way, if a wave of anything hit him he wouldn't want to do anything for weeks, and his moods never kept themselves in check either.

The only time he had any control over his emotions was when Kyle was there.

'Want me to make you feel better.'

It was Kyle's voice in his mind, and he felt himself flush, his eyes were set on the back of Kyle's head, and it didn't make him feel awkward thinking about it, in fact he felt just as comfortable around him as he ever had done, that just proves this one off wouldn't effect anything, not that he was going to be sharing it with him, now that would make things awkward.

His mind was pulled away from it's thought track as a cool can had been shoved into his hand, he tightened his grasp around it and looked towards Kenny who was the one who had handed it to him.

"Stan? You feeling okay? You look a bit red?"

Kenny looked genuinely worried for him, which was expected, he was not fully recovered so anything could set him off, he nodded his head and looked down to the can.

"You don't need to drink it if you don't feel right."

Kenny added after there was no response, at this moment Kyle had took a step towards them, pressing the back of his hand to Stan's forehead, he frowned and concern flashed through his face.

"Stan you're burning up, I think you should sit down for a minute."

Kyle told him, taking the can out of his hand he placed it on the table and returned to Stan's side, both he and Kenny helping him over to the couch, without the help he wouldn't have managed it, he was starting to feel a little dizzy, not like he had done before, this was a little different, so as soon as he sat down he closed his eyes and lay his head back, this time it was a well known feeling in his stomach, and upon opening his eyes he shook his head at the two pairs of eyes staring back at him.

"I'm just hungry."

He told them.

"BUTTERS!"

"Jesus Christ."

Kyle called out just after Eric's outburst, giving him a scowl, the three of them looking towards the brunette who was ignoring their stares.

"Yeah?"

Butters' voice called down from the top of the stairs, he sounded like he was out of breath.

"Bring the food down. And hurry up."

"Yessir."

Now Eric turned to look at the eyes that were on him.

"What? I'm hungry too."

He informed them, trying to pass if off as nothing unusual, which it wasn't Stan just happened to mention that he was hungry at the very same time that Eric felt himself becoming hungry, there was no special treatment there.

It had taken Butters three runs to get all the food down to them, it was now laid out nicely on the table, Eric, Kenny and Butters sat on the one couch facing inwards, and Stan and Kyle sat on the other one opposite, Stan, Kenny and Eric had had their fill of the food, at the same time idle chit chat ensued, they had yet to drink their open cans, Eric had insisted that they wait for each other else there would be no fun in it.

"I think we should play truth or dare."

Eric piped up.

"That's so gay, and so overused that it's boring."

Kyle jumped in just as quickly.

"No, your just scared I'm going to get you to share your jew gold with us."

"I'm not scared of anything, I'm just saying it's gay and overused, and that that is not the best you can come up with fatass."

"I swear Kahl, I will kick you in the nuts. And then… I will kick you and your broken nuts out of mah house."

"Oh come on. Can we just get to the drinking. We can decide once we get there."

Kenny cut in, hoping to cut the altercation down a little.

"We haven't started drinking yet?"

Butters questioned them all with a hiccup announcing that he had already started, he eyed the opening.

"Aw shucks…"

They all laughed in unison, leaving a confusion and slightly tipsy Butters confused, that was where they all joined him, drinking as much as they could from their first can, each of them pulling a face at the taste of it.

"How does anyone get joy from this?"

Kyle questioned openly.

"How did Butters do it so quick?"

Stan added, placing his own can down onto the table, it was an open question one which he had no care if anyone answered, the only sort of response he received was a hum from Kenny and a grunt from Eric.

"It gets better, it started to make my tongue tingle, and once it did, I could drink more."

Butters announced rather proudly, Kyle raised a brow at his comment, it sounded reasonable, if maybe a little stretched, he glared back down at his can and sucked in a deep breath, Eric immediately picked up on this and a demonic smirk appeared.

"I double dare ya to drink it in one go."

"What? No!"

Eric sat back his own beer sloshing just over the rim and down himself, to which he ignored and continued to stare down Kyle.

"You do it, or… you have a shot of scotch. Kenny will do it won't ya Kenny?"

With a shrug Kenny took his can to his lips and tipped his head back, the further he went the slower he drank, feeling the liquid beginning to pool in his stomach, it was a little difficult, not because of it because of the fizz, but the taste was foul… but the sheer will power of getting to a point where his tongue went tingly would be enough, that way they could abuse this opportunity.

Had this just turned into a drinking game?

Kenny finally came to a stop, crushing the can pathetically in his hand he dropped it onto the table and grinned to the rest of the group, Butters let out a cry of joy and waved his arms a little which caused the sofa to move, and Eric's drink spilt for a second time.

"Butters god dammit sit still."

Laying his head down on the back of the couch Butters stared towards Eric his smile still remained.

"Sorry Eric."

He apologized sincerely, to which the brunette frowned and turned his attention back to Kyle, how in himself actually looked pretty defeated, this was pathetic, who knew what this was going to do to him, he had heard so many stories and the reasons behind it had almost ninety nine percent of the time been related to drinking… in effect this was just the excuse everyone uses when they do something stupid and he would rather go without.. The sound of another empty can being crushed up tore him away from his thoughts, and he turned to see that Stan had just finished his in one go, and he felt slightly left out, wasn't Stan supposed to be on his side anyway?

Stan instantly picked up on the face Kyle had, he shook his head, trying to quickly ease him.

"I'd rather that than the scotch dude.. you only gotta do it once."

"Yeah Kahl.. only once, unless you're a.."

"Shut up Cartman."

Stan cut him off before he could even finish his words, and before he could even respond to Stan, Stan once more cut him off.

"You go first. I triple-dog-dare you."

To this Kyle felt a little bit better, he gave Stan a smile and then turned to look towards Eric, in fact so did Kenny and Butters.

"Oh, Eric, you gotta do that now."

Butters told him.

Eric sighed, that was something he had been trying to avoid, he didn't even know how any of them had taken a sip and kept it down, he nearly threw his own back up, so he took in a deep breath and pinched his nose as tightly as he could, taking the drink back, and drinking it as quickly as he could,

"Oh god.."

He said when he was taking a breather, another deep breath and he finished the last of his drink, chucking the empty can behind him, he renewed himself and stood up and flexed his non existent muscles.

"That's how it's done."

"I have never seen such a performance in all my life."

Kenny said arching a brow, which caused Eric to backhand his shoulder, and Kenny then laughed, clutching at his shoulder he rolled to the side and hung over the side of the couch, his laughing continued.

"Your life will end if you don't stop."

Eric bit back, sitting himself back down.

Once he had calmed himself down he straightened himself out and Kyle willingly downed his own drink, now they were all just as even as the next, each of them were now on their second can, this time they were taking it at their own pace, each of their speech had started to slur, and everything made them laugh, Eric had commented a few times that he felt like he was floating on a cloud, to which Kyle had responded with the fact that no cloud would hold his weight.. more so to annoy him because even he knew that a cloud wouldn't even hold him up… And instead of a snidey remark, he laughed it off, and because he was laughing so was everyone else, in fact, it had never been any stranger.

"Okay… okay.. ok you guy, seriously, ser.. wait."

Eric was trying to sit himself up, rocking himself backwards once more he forced himself up, and he dropped his head a little as he felt himself go a little dizzy.

"Woah.. you guys really need to do that."

And they did, at the same time they all rocked back and forced himself into a sitting up position, each of them experiencing what Eric had just done seconds ago.

"Woah."

They all said together, and then Eric continued.

"Stanley Marsh?"

Stan chuckled at the full use of his name coming from Eric, and he rose his brows giving him his attention, now that they had drunk so quickly the rush was just as equal in all of them.

"Truuuth or dare?"

Eric questioned him.

Stan let his mind wander, he bit his bottom lip and looked over to Kyle who was now sitting back again, his eyes were on him too, all their eyes were, waiting for him to respond, and so he returned his own gaze back to Eric.

"Truth."

Eric seemed a little disappointed that he hadn't gone for dare but it soon passed away as his mind whirred, and he cocked his head.. taking a sip from the can he spoke.

"Have you ever seen your sister naked?"

"DUDE! NO!.. What kind of question is that?"

Stan told him, feeling a little grossed out, Eric just laughed and took another sip from his can, although he soon returned it and this time gulped it down.

"Welcome to truth or dare.."

He winked and Stan cringed, Butters slipped off the couch and grabbed another beer, as if automatically knowing that Eric would be requesting another one soon, which was right because just as he sat back down Eric patted him on the head. He looked so out of it, how the hell did this stuff get you so quickly?

"Your turn."

Eric nodded towards him.

"Kenny, truth or dare?"

Stan asked.

"I'll have dare."

Did he even think about that one?

"I dare you to down your can."

Kenny rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath about it being too easy, and with that he done it again, without hesitation, he also found that it was much easier to do, the taste was almost becoming good, which was in itself strange, but there was no way it would be questioned.

"Next time be creative."

Kenny warned him.

"Isn't it supposed to be light to begin with?"

Stan asked him, to which Kenny shrugged, honestly he didn't really care for this game.

"Kyle. Truth or Dare?"

Kenny asked him, causing the red head to glance up, he had been running his finger along the rim of the can, not really paying much attention to anything, because he still slightly against this game, in fact he was still against the drink he held in his hand, but it was better than losing whatever pride he had left.

"Dare.."

He paused.

"No. Wait I meant truth!"

"You said dare, it's a dare, you can't back out once you say it."

Eric told him, to which Kenny nodded in agreement and Butters muttered something about going to the toilet, which was confirmed when he stood up and went up the stairs.

"Oh come on let him change it."

Stan said glancing between the two opposing boys, who both shook their heads, Eric smirking, and Kenny chuckling, Kyle sighed and sat himself up, steadying himself using the table when he felt the effect of the alcohol.

"Just get on with it."

"I dare you to kiss Stan, if you don't do it, then you take two shots of scotch."

"WHAT?!"

Both Stan and Kyle spoke up, the shock clear on their face, Eric was laughing pretty loudly, clutching at his stomach he rolled back.

"That is so gaaaay."

Eric called out through his laughter, Kenny's smirk returned on his face awaiting the outcome, Kyle shook his head his face blood red..

"Get me the scotch."

Was it strange that that made Stan's heart drop, not that he was wanting to kiss Kyle not at all, it was just that he preferred to drink rather than do this one thing, something that had no danger to his health at all, and even more because Kyle was so against drinking in the first place, that just made him feel a little worse… Why was he this bothered by it? There was no way he wanted that, no way..

Was there?

The sharp tap of glass against wood pulled him away, his eyes landed on the shot glass and the scotch that Kenny was now pouring into the glass, once it hit the brim he pushed it across the table to Kyle, who as Stan had noticed had not once looked over to him..

Kyle knocked it back and he felt his entire being burn.. well that was what it felt like, even after the beer supposedly helped he could still feel it, his throat was the worst, and it was making his eyes water uncontrollably.

"Hurry and give me another."

Kenny complied and refilled the glass handing it back to him, Kyle took the second one back and dropped the glass to the floor.

"No.. no never ever again.. I'm not doing it, that's it, I give up.. I don't care what you say.."

Kyle started as he stood to his feet and made his way to the back of the room, kneeling himself in front of the ice box he collected the ice water in his hands and tipped it into his mouth, just letting it settle there to cool him down, it must have done it on it's own, but the way it made the water taste was even worse.

"God, he's such a pussy."

"You okay?"

Stan called over to him, ignoring Eric's comment, even from where he sat he saw Kyle shake his head, he pushed himself up from the couch, he actually felt fine aside from the slight wobble in his step towards his friend.

Kyle's face was hidden, he was resting his head in his arm which was against the edge of the ice box, kneeling himself down beside him he pressed his hand to Kyle's shoulder.

"I feel sick Stan."

The boy mumbled into his sleeve.

"Let's get you upstairs."

Stan told him, placing his hand under his arm to move the boy he pulled him away from the ice box and they both stood together, Kyle seemed a little more limp than normal so Stan allowed him to lean on him.

"Is he alright?"

Kenny asked genuinely feeling bad about his decision.

Stan nodded toward him.

"Cartman, I'm gonna take him to the bathroom."

"As long as you clean up your messes I don't care what you do."

Eric replied simply, opening up another can that had somehow been collected on the table.

Guiding Kyle up the stairs they made it through the living room, where Butters was laying face down on the couch, he guessed he was asleep because the only movement coming from him was the slow and steady breaths, and the very light snores he could hear coming from him, he hadn't got very far, and well, he didn't blame him either, he was just glad he was not in such a state, but then again the thought made him feel worse, because Kyle must have been feeling worse.

Reaching the bathroom Kyle pulled away from him, heading straight for the toilet, he sat down beside it and pulled the seat up just as quickly as he did he threw up the burn from the scotch had returned, he could feel it in his throat, he could feel it in his nose, and the thought made him gag and he emptied more of the alcohol out of his stomach and into the toilet.

After he felt safe to remove himself he pulled away and sat against the wall, Stan took the opportunity to make his way over and flush, the contents had disappeared, ripping some tissue off he hand it to Kyle who took it and wiped his face.

"Need some water?"

Kyle nodded.

Stan disappeared for a moment and returned with a glass, filling it with water he handed that too to Kyle, he took it and drank some, his head dropping back against the wall, he could feel himself going dizzy again, this time at least he didn't feel sick.

"Thanks."

Kyle said a little croaky, Stan shook his head and sat himself down next to him.

"You're welcome."

"I think Wendy's going break up with you."

Where the hell did that come from? Stan frowned and looked to Kyle, who was still resting his head against the wall, his eyes were closed, but he still continued to speak.

"You really don't deserve that Stan, you are worth so much more, I don't like when you hurt, it makes me hurt too."

Kyle said honestly, and Stan remained silent, still possibly trying to process where the red head had just brought that up from, and what was he really trying to say to him, that drink must have really hit him hard.

"Then what do I deserve?"

Stan asked him, hoping he would be able to make sense of his own words, and this was the only opportunity he was going to get, even if that was a little bit like using the situation for his own gain.

"You deserve someone who loves you Stan, someone who truly loves you, that would be there for you no matter what.. someone that understands you.. and someone that you love in return."

"I love Wendy."

"No, you think you love her Stan."

Stan frowned at his words, shaking his head he pushed himself away from him a little so that he could get a clearer view of him.

"What's with you? You don't know how I feel about her? I do love her."

"Then why were you dreaming about me Stan?"

Stan froze and Kyle turned his head, his eyes opening to meet Stan's gaze… how did he know? He was there when he woke up sure, but there was no way he could tell, and even if he did talk in his sleep he couldn't get all that from it.

And just when his brain function returned to him, he was once again taken off guard, Kyle was no longer against the wall, but he was pressing Stan against it, he was leaning over him, and his lips were pressed against his own… Stan couldn't move, he couldn't even blink, he just stared wide eyed, and then Kyle pulled away almost as instantly, returning to where he was against the wall, silence.

"Sorry, I didn't want you to think I was so against it, I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"You never could."

Not only was Stan just open and honest with Kyle, he was opening up to himself, maybe this had a bonus to it, Kyle mentioning all that he did really made him think deep enough about it, he didn't love Wendy, he was just that used to having her there that that was all he had grown accustomed to..

Kyle was right.

 **It's been a while since I've done any kind of writing like this,**

 **and I have to say I am enjoying it, hope you all are too! ^^**


	4. Chapter Four

Kyle's sudden movement shifted Stan away from his thoughts, he glanced towards him, noticing how off balance he was Stan stood himself up, thankful that at least he had only had a bit to drink, and yes it had affected him at first, but his worry for Kyle must have taken over that, and although he may have been sobering up quickly, he still felt terrible that he had a part in bringing Kyle into all of this, sure there was a few other counts that would not be down to him.

Kyle must have chucked up four times, and each time he seemed to be sobering up, it was still torture to have to do that just to get sober, but even with the water that Stan provided, he was still pretty drunk.

"I feel much better now Stan."

"You sure?"

"I think I'm sure."

"Okay, what do you want to do? Stay or cut it short and go?"

Kyle seemed to have some difficulty trying to express how that question made him feel, sure he was feeling better, as in there was no way he needed to be sick any more, which he needed to keep an eye on because he could never be that sure, but for him to head home, still pretty drunk would be the end of him, not only would his father deal with him, but his mother too, he would be nothing, he might even be kicked out, what if he got banished?

"Dude!"

Stan frowned at the sudden response from him, he was knelt down just in front of him, offering him his hand so that he could help him up.

"What?"

"Don't.. not home dude, just… please, I can't."

"Kyle, I was not going to force you, I just wanted to know what you wanted to do."

Now he felt a wash of relief, and to emphasize that to Stan he wiped the back of his hand across his forehead, and sighed a soft 'phew', to which caused Stan to smirk, this was one side of Kyle he had never really come across, he knew when it was just the two of them they would always be themselves, and yes, they could both be childish, that was a small part of why they were super best friends, but this now, made Kyle also a little vulnerable.. and Stan would always be there to make sure he was safe, especially since they were in Eric's place, more the reason he needed to keep a close eye on him, god only knows what could happen.

"So we are staying?"

"Yeah."

Kyle said as he took his hand and pushed himself against the side of the toilet, Stan pulled at the same time and Kyle was now standing up, a little wobby sure, but he was up.

"Thanks Stan, for always being there for me."

Kyle said, turning so that he could pull Stan into his arms, his movements were a little clumsy, but Stan didn't mention that, he just accepted him, he placed his own arms around Kyle and smiled, even as Kyle dropped his head against his shoulder, he held him close and then Kyle nuzzled himself into Stan's neck.

"I wish I could make you feel better."

It was only a soft whisper that tickled his neck, but he heard it, had he just quoted his dream? How much had he heard, and what makes him think that it was as detailed as Stan knows it to have been, unless there was more? But for now he needed to concentrate and making sure that Kyle was okay, so he patted him once on his back.

"You have dude, now come on, let's get back downstairs, we will just take it easy now, no more drinks."

Kyle nodded in agreement and pulled himself away, and they both made their way for the stairs, Butters was still passed out on the couch, and by the looks of it Eric had been messing with him because there was something hanging out of his mouth, which Stan would rather leave and not even get into, he shook his head and rolled his eyes.

They made their way down and into the basement, the smell of alcohol lingered in the air, and it was enough to make your head spin, Stan glanced across and found Kenny spread out on one of the couches, wearing nothing more than his boxers, nothing really too strange there.

"Everything okay?"

Kenny called out from underneath his arm, which he didn't move to question them both.

"Yeah, everything's okay now, where's Cartman?"

This time Kenny moved his arm, dropping it to his side he turned his head a little so that he could see them, he looked just as drunk as Kyle probably felt.

"He's in his room, he said he needed to do something, so he's either up to no good as usual, or he used it as an excuse to pussy out."

Kenny then shrugged and leant himself forward grabbing the back of the couch to give him something to pull up with… just as Stan was going to sit himself opposite the blonde, Kenny tapped the couch he was sitting on.

"Both of you sit this side."

He said, moving himself over to the very end.

Kyle was the first the response, he moved away from Stan and seated himself down next to Kenny, Stan shrugged it off and joined the two, seating himself on the other end.

"You guys are my best friends right?"

It had been a few moments of silence before Kenny spoke up, and Stan could tell that it had taken him some time to even bring up the courage, no matter how drunk he was, so he frowned, as if it would be obvious, it was Kyle that beat him to an answer.

"Why do you even need to ask us that?"

"I just wanted to know."

"Yes, Kenny both of us are, and don't forget that."

Kyle told him, Stan responding with a nod, Kenny leant his head back and closed his eyes, sighing rather contently, Kyle leant his head against Kenny's naked shoulder, his own eyes coming to a close, and Stan smiled, he still couldn't believe that Kenny would need to ask them that, did he feel left out? Like some kind of third wheel? He knew there was no high love for Eric, but still the four of them had been together since they could just about walk.. and Eric was not exactly a person you could come to for problems, in fact, never would anyone go to Eric for problems, unless they were desperate, was that what Kenny had been doing? Using Eric as his last resort because he thought that Stan and Kyle would be too busy to help him… now the thoughts were whirling in his mind and he couldn't stop thinking about it, as crazy as they sounded to him, and out of this world, there could be some kind of truth in them… unless his imagination was getting the better of him..

Sighing he pushed them away, leaning his head against his hand he closed his eyes, listening to the soft breathing of his friends, he felt relaxed, and calm, and that helped him fall into a deep sleep.

This time sleep felt unwelcoming, he was far too aware of how dark it was, there was nothing there but his consciousness, he was all alone and that scared him, never in his life did he want to feel alone, just as quickly as the thought passed through him a red light flickered on, and it continued to flicker as he neared it, he didn't want to move closer but he had no control over his body, he didn't know what it was, nor did he wish to, it continued to flicker.

"No."

It came out as a strangled cry.

"Let me go."

Stan called out, the silence around him was crushing, he closed his eyes as tightly as he could, he could feel tears slipping down his face.

"I will never accept you Stan, you are nothing to me."

"Kyle?"

It was Kyle's voice, he could hear him, but he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes.

"You're pathetic, look at yourself… I can't believe I used to put so much faith in you, you were my everything, and you had to go an ruin it didn't you?"

"Kyle, I didn't, I'm sorry, please… don't say that, please."

"It's too late."

"No."

Stan reached out into the darkness towards Kyle's voice, his chest was tightening, and his tears felt like they were falling harder.

"Please!"

Just as he brought up the courage to open his eyes the darkness vanished, he felt himself being shook, and as soon as his eyes started to focus his eyes met with Kenny's, who was stood in front of him, his attention was all on him, and Stan's breathing began to calm down, relief washing over him, his head dropped back and Kenny stood up straight.

"You're sweating dude."

Stan's chest raised quickly a few times before he let out a long sigh, hoping to calm himself down, but just knowing it was a nightmare was enough to help with that.

"Sorry if I woke you."

Stan apologized, and Kenny shook his head.

"I was already up, went to the bathroom, I came back and you're looking a bit distressed, it's a wonder you didn't wake Kyle up."

Kenny added nodding over to the red head who is now curled up in a ball at the end of the couch, fast asleep, or that drunk he was more passed out, either way Stan thought he looked peaceful and it made his heart ache as the nightmare burned deep into his memory, he was not going to get that out of his head for a long time.

"What was it about?"

Kenny questioned him as he seated himself on the table, sitting directly in front of Stan, Stan met his gaze and sighed, his head shaking.

"I'm not really sure.. It's all a blur now."

"Well, if you do remember, I'm here."

He muttered, and Stan nodded acknowledging his words, and it was comforting, Kenny stood and slipped himself into the gap between Kyle and Stan, settling himself down he closed his eyes and returned to sleep, not needing to say nothing more.

Stan was just glad to know it was over, maybe this time around he could finish his sleep undisturbed, maybe this was a result of falling ill, it had happened to him many times, it was like at the point of falling ill his mind would become over active, especially at night, that was all he could put it down to.

 **Got my very first review! Woo! ^^ Given me some more confidence about this, so that's made me really happy, thank you to everyone who is having a read. (:**


	5. Chapter Five

"What a bunch of fags."

Those five words reverberated around the basement a few times before the three males on the sofa started to register it, Kenny still in the middle had both Stan and Kyle laying their heads on his chest, both of their legs were up on the couch, Kenny's legs were outstretched upon the table, his head back and his mouth wide open, Stan was the first to peel his face away from Kenny, touching his cheek he felt the warmth, and it was slightly damp, nice.. Rubbing at his eyes he frowned glancing to both Kenny and Kyle who were coming around a little slower than he had done, Kyle pulled away from him just as Kenny sat himself up, Kyle rubbed at his head, his hair sticking to the side of his face, and then the three of them simultaneously looked towards Eric who was standing at the bottom of the stairs, arms folded across his chest and his brows rose, his camera hung around his neck… he didn't… he must have read each of their looks because a smirk broke out and he held a hand up, a single picture held between his fingers.

"Fuck you fatass."

It was Kyle's voice that rose from the couch, and just as quickly as he had said it he was up and to his feet, stumbling a little as his legs were getting used to the change in position, the blood rushed to his head and he wobbled once before storming across the room to where Eric was standing.

Snatching the picture from out of Eric's grasp he tore it up and let it drop to the floor, Kyle frowned at the fact that there was no protect from Eric, he turned his attention back to Eric.

"It's not the only picture is it?"

"Oh my dear Kahl, you're learning."

Eric responded looking as smug as ever.

"Fuck it, do what you want."

Kyle told him, it was not his own way of showing that he was defeated, in fact he was just leaving the matter for now, he felt like tearing him a new one, but the pain that throbbed in his head was enough to put him off anything for now, in fact all he wanted to do was sit around and just do nothing.. he knew that wouldn't last very long of course, this was South Park.

"What is that it? Oh come on, I've been looking forward to this part."

Eric said sounding a little whiny, very normal for him…

"Don't start something Cartman, none of us are in the mood."

Stan called up in defence.. Was they ever in the mood?

"Fine. My show and tell will be fun this week, just you guys wait."

"You two wanna come back to mine for a few hours?"

Kyle asked casually, to which both Stan and Kenny nodded, ignoring Eric's protests and empty threats which soon paid off because he soon left them to finish packing their things together, out of the three of them Kyle looked the worst, he looked paler than normal and his eyes looked heavy and dark, and he still look as though he was going to throw up at any second, but he never said anything, Kenny looked just as pale, but he looked more tired than anything, even when he tightened his parka around his face it was clear that he had some kind of issue sleeping, and Stan himself, he actually had some color, even if it was pink tinges to his cheeks, he could just blame that on the cold.

"You know Cartman's going to make sure he shows the pictures."

Kenny said after a moments silence, the three of them were now making their way down to Kyle's, Stan chuckled and shook his head.

"Honestly, I don't even care, let him show it, it's not like we were doing anything too gay right?"

This made both Kenny and Kyle laugh, and hell it was great to hear laughter, the night dragged on so long, but then again that might have been because he was the most sober of the boys.

"Suppose you got a point, if he gets a kick out of it, then leave him to it."

Kyle added just as they reached his door, opening it up he let the other in before closing it, the warmth of the house welcoming them, and it felt amazing.

"Just go up, I'll be there shortly."

Kyle told them, and they automatically made their way for the stairs and straight into Kyle's room, Kenny sat himself down on Kyle's desk chair loosening his hood, and dropping his bag down just beside the desk, whereas Stan sat himself down on Kyle's bed, his own bag he dropped to the floor and lay himself back, sprawling himself over the bed, it was quiet for a moment until Kenny broke it.

"So do you remember?"

Stan closed his eyes and sighed, which did not go unnoticed by the blond, why couldn't he have forgotten about it?

"It was nothing dude, just forget about it."

"Well do you get them often?"

Stan shook his head.

"Was it about Kyle?"

Stan shot up and his gaze met the blond's, just as he was about to protest Kyle stepped through the door.

"Mom's going to make us something to eat."

Just after he closed the door Kyle turned and frowned, his eyes switched from both Kenny and Stan who were looking towards each other, Stan's expression a little startled, and Kenny's well, he couldn't quite decide what Kenny's expression showed, maybe something like realization, or was it more questioning? Kyle had a hard time deciding so he shook his head.

"Did I miss something?"

He openly questioned, Stan now looked to him, his cheeks still red, but this time it was because of his embarrassment, even though it was his own reaction that had brought it on.

"No, nothing… sorry, what's your Mom going to make?"

Kyle's stared at him quizzically, but didn't really find the need to question it further.

"She's making us some sandwiches."

As if on cue Stan's stomach growled pretty loudly, causing Kyle to laugh gently in response, he moved and sat himself down next to Stan, who moved accordingly to give him space, and Stan tried his best to not look Kenny in the eye… he could feel his eyes on him, but he couldn't bring himself to look his way just to confirm it… goddammit there was no way that he knew right? How could he had figured it out? Had he slipped up somehow? Had he heard something when he was sleeping? It was like some kind of repeat.. he knew Kyle knew something from his last dream, and he only knew part of that… but Kenny was much harder to read.

"So what are you guys going to be doing for show and tell?"

Stan was trying his best to keep the conversation going, at least for now Kyle shook his head.

"Not sure yet, Ike said he had a few things he wanted me to show off for him, but that might be a little weird."

Kyle said with a chuckle, his attention then diverted and he looked over to Kenny.

"What about you Ken?"

Stan took this moment to look over to the blond, who had thankfully shifted his gaze to Kyle, shrugging his shoulders he couldn't bring himself to answer, and in all honestly he didn't know what he was going to be doing for it, in fact he hadn't really thought or even cared to think about it.

"Kyle, come down."

"Be right back."

Kyle said, cutting the moment short, he left the room and Kenny's attention was back on Stan.

"I don't know what you are worried about, I'm not going to say anything."

"About what? There's nothing to say."

"About how you feel about Kyle."

Stan froze at Kenny's way of phrasing it, how on earth had he come to that conclusion when even he himself had not got to that stage of thought, well not fully anyway.

"Don't even think of denying it Stan, I can tell by how different you act around him, you're confused so you can't see it yet, you're trying to pass it off as something else aren't you?"

"Can we talk about this later?"

Kenny nodded, at least he was getting somewhere.

"Told you I'm here."

This time around when Kyle returned he had food for them all, it would be their final night together before they had to go back to school, which of course none were looking forward to, did anyone ever..

It was rounding off to eight and unfortunately it was Kyle's mom that had to let them know it was getting a little late, late enough for them to need to be.. Both Kenny and Stan took their things and waved gave their goodnights, and with that they both left.

"So tomorrow?"

It was Stan to speak first, and Kenny gave him a supportive smile, at least he had left his hood down so that Stan could have a proper conversation with him, not that it was a problem anyway all of them had grown accustomed to his muffled words.

"You can come over mine if you like after school, just the two of us."

Kenny offered and Stan smiled, it was a little wash of relief, of course he had no idea how he was going to approach this subject, it was all a little bit delicate, especially since Kenny seemed to take it a lot easier than he would have thought him to have done, but then again… Kenny had always been supportive, even if it had gone unnoticed by them, and Stan really appreciated that from him, it was comforting.

"Cheers dude, it's mean a whole lot. See you at the bus stop."

"Sleep well Stan."

And with that the two went their separate ways, only temporary of course, but still Stan couldn't help but feel alone, was this really what he had been brought to? Had his dreams been trying to scream something at him? A soft vibration came from his pocket and Stan stopped in his tracks pulling his phone out.

'Stop worrying about it.'

-Kenny

'I'm not worrying about anything.'

-Stan

'Sure you're not. Goodnight.'

-Kenny

Just how easily could he read him, it was not like there was some kind of beacon above his head letting everyone know that he was falling for Kyle..

Wait.

Had that thought just ran through his mind?

There was no way.

"Oh God!"

Stan spoke into the empty but cool air, he was stood still, his head seemed to have skipped a few beats at his sudden realization, he was falling for him, and he was falling hard.. yeah it might have been just a dream, and he might have just dismissed it as best he could, but everything else pointed to that, each time he found himself not just looking at him, but staring, remembering the kiss, remembering how right Kyle was.

What was it that Kyle thought of him, especially since he knew something about one of his dreams.. the thought of it made him flush with embarrassment, he was so stupid, why had God made him this way? Why did God make it so difficult? Why was everything so damn hard?

As soon as Stan was home, he went straight upstairs and into his room, the door closed he lay face down on his bed, his head in the pillow..

What the hell was he going to do?

Turning himself over he was back to his phone.

'Dude, I don't think I can wait until tomorrow, I'm freaking out.'

-Stan

Five minutes passed and there was no reply from Kenny, Stan by this point was pacing back and forth in his room, the lights were off so the only source was the moonlight.

'Come on Ken, I really need your help right now. Just someone to talk to.'

-Stan

'Please.'

-Stan

Laying on his back Stan closed his eyes, his mind was racing and there was nothing that could slow it down, no matter how much he tried to think of something else.. his phone lay upon his chest, so when it went off he jumped, but immediately took to it, there was a new message but it was not from Kenny.

'Stan. I know it's been a while, but we really need to have a talk, meet me at my locker tomorrow recess.'

-Wendy

With everything that had happened his mind had slipped, completely forgetting that he would need to face her at some point, so that was it, that was where she was going to break everything off with him, he would certainly be alone then.. this night was hellish.

'Yeah we do. I'll see you there.'

-Stan

Was it okay that he actually felt pretty good about it?

Several thuds against his window caused him to jump for the second time of the night, his heart felt like it was in his mouth and his eyes were wide, shock had surely took over, looking towards the window he spotted Kenny's smiling face there, and there was nothing strong enough that would hold his own smile back, shifting across his bed he reached up and unlocked the window, the slimmer boy got through and pulled the window to a close behind him.

"I thought it was easier."

Kenny told him with a nervous chuckle, obviously it was risky since Stan parents could catch him at any moment, but still that was all worth it, especially since Stan needed him, he couldn't refuse helping him out, he said he was there, and there he was going to be.

"Thank You."

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	6. Chapter Six

"You can't stay long though."

"No, I know, I'll stay as long as I can, and as long as you need me anyway."

Stan was under his covers, Kenny sitting next to him, ready to jump down the side of the bed at the point of anyone walking in, his Mom and Dad wouldn't really care but he didn't want to get Stan into trouble, so the plan had to be there, and ready to be used at any moment, they were both on high alert.

"So. What are you freaking out about?"

Stan felt himself swallow a little too hard, and for some reason now that Kenny was there he couldn't mention it, like he had once again started to freeze up, turning to face him he gave him an awkward side smile, to which Kenny cocked his head, waiting for him to answer his question, there was no way he could back out of it now, besides, Kenny came all this way and possibly came close to breaking his neck getting up to his window.

"It's about Kyle. I think, okay wait no. I don't think I know, and I only know because my mind just kinda blurted it out to me yano, like when you're having a rant with yourself and the truth just hits you right in the face.."

"Stan.."

"I mean there is no way it cannot be so if you just accidentally tell it to yourself if you know what I mean, I mean, there can't…"

"Stan…"

Kenny placed his hand on Stan's shoulder and he stopped his rambling, understanding that that was what Kenny was getting at, sometimes he went through that, whenever he was nervous, or whenever he had no idea how to properly explain something.

"I'm falling for Kyle.."

"I know, and before you ask, no one else knows, I just figured it out, and I guessed even before you did too."

Stan couldn't believe it, and for those few moments he let it run through his head, and Kenny allowed him to, he needed a moment to process it if he was ever going to accept it.

"How did you figure it out Ken?"

"I'm not entirely sure, you just seemed to be a little different around him, more careful I think, none of you notice any differences with me, but even the smallest of things with any of you and I see it, that on top of the nightmare, it all made sense."

"I always notice your differences, don't ever think that I don't, because I do, I really do, you are just as much a part of this as any of us, you're my best friend dude, and I'd always be here for you.. I mean like.. if you needed that."

Stan told him, Kenny already knew that, maybe he just wanted to test him and see what exactly he picked up on first, it obviously registered, and it confirmed that none of them would be alone no matter what happened.

"Wait a second, Kenny is there something you're not telling me?"

Kenny shook his head.

"What are you going to do about Kyle?"

Kenny asked him, changing the subject, Stan was able to pick up on that fact but still, he didn't want to press the matter, so instead he chose to answer him, nothing more than a shrug, his gaze dropping down to his lap.

"I'm not sure, I mean I can't exactly tell him, 'Oh hey Kyle are you looking forward to school today? Oh by the way dude I'm falling in love with you, just got to wait though because my girlfriend will be breaking it off with me at recess, hope that's cool.' Somehow I don't think that would work."

Stan said sarcastically, Kenny nudged him and let out a soft chuckle.

"Idiot, you don't do it so obviously, you need to drop hints, make sure you understand how comfortable he is, unless you know already, then you should be able to tell him anything, and because I know from the past with how close you two are, I'm sure you wouldn't lose him as a friend even if you told him.. and hey if he accepts you in any other way.. I'd say that's a bonus don't you?"

Kenny said wiggling his brows and nudging Stan once more, who responded with a glare, although the face that Kenny was pulling made him crack a smile.

"Please keep your mind out the gutter."

"Hey, I've behaved this weekend."

"Yeah, see that I noticed."

"But this is the week, so it's going to be a little different."

Stan rolled his eyes and shoved at Kenny who was making kissy faces, with another shove Kenny dropped off the side of the bed and both of them burst into laughter, tears were streaming down Stan's face and just as he was about to comment on the matter the door opened.

"Shut up TUUURD! I'M TRYING TO GET TO SLEEP!"

Stan held his hand across his mouth as Shelly shouted into him, and as soon as the door shut with a slam he dropped back facing down into the pillow, letting his laughter out that way, Kenny doing the same into the mattress.. Until they were able to function as normal as they could.

Wiping his face Kenny stood up.

"Okay, I think it's time for me to go, you gonna be okay?"

Stan nodded his head and Kenny patted him soft on the back.

"Good, as long as you are."

"Kenny, be careful on that ladder, I don't want you dying because of my stupidity."

Kenny chuckled and shook his head.

"Don't worry, it wouldn't be the first time."

"Huh?"

Stan cocked his head at Kenny's remark, and Kenny waved it off, and as soon as he did he left through the window, leaving Stan with nothing but the silence and the cool air, but this time around he did feel much better, talking really helped and that was what he was most grateful for, that Kenny would do that for him, especially in his time of need.

Dropping back onto the bed Stan watched as a few snowflakes drifted through the open window landing upon his bed, this very moment was the moment he decided it would be best to talk to Kyle about how he was feeling, if he didn't then he wouldn't be able to keep it hidden, and he would rather he heard it from himself than someone else, of course he knew for a fact that Kenny would keep it a secret, but there was always ways of things getting out, not that anyone ever really knew how it was just the way things worked, the way things had been intended.

But this was the only way he would be able to know the truth, how Kyle would take it and how it would affect everything which his mind was already working towards the bad rather than the good, he had no crystal ball.

Stan must have fell asleep because he found himself waking up to the sound of his alarm, and he certainly felt the effects of the weekend, his eyes were heavy and his body felt bruised, he just wanted to remain there for eternity, yeah right, like that would ever happen..

Knocking his clock on to snooze he pulled at his covers, tugging the warmth over himself, the cool air sharp against his cheek, another five minutes would do.

It did him some kind of favour because when Sharon came to make sure he was up he actually felt like he could move, she had of course given him an earful because of his window being left wide open during the night, but that was nothing new, there was always something a tired parent or tired sibling would either rant or argue about.. not many people woke up happy in a morning, Stan never did, he was never much of a morning person.

Luckily for him the bus had not arrived, which was about right since he was on time himself, but his heart sank, there was no sign of Kyle, there was no sign of Eric either but that was not exactly where his focus was on, his eyes found a flicker of orange and Kenny was stood leaning against the bus stop sign waving to get his attention, was it just the two of them for the day? Not that it was a bad thing maybe this was a blessing in disguise, it would give him more time to think through everything, give him the chance to make sure if he was going to just tell Kyle straight, or use a few tactics, both ideas were just as bad as the other, but it was too difficult, and now that was going to be on his mind all day, which meant school was going to drag just as much.

Just as he reached Kenny's side his phone went off, pulling it free he found a message from Kyle, it was like he could sense his worry for him, like he knew he needed to make sure he put Stan's mind at rest.

'I won't be coming in today, I'm not feeling all that good. I'll call you later.'

-Kyle

He felt slightly guilty that it could be his fault for Kyle feeling ill, of course he couldn't confirm it for himself yet because he didn't know exactly how Kyle was feeling, but still the guilt remained.

'Okay dude, I'll talk to you later, get well.'

-Stan

"You look like you didn't get any sleep."

Kenny pointed out once Stan put his phone away, sighing he nodded his head and dropped it against the metal pole.

"Kyle's ill, and I think it's my fault."

Kenny didn't bother pressing that he just changed the subject, he knew that Stan had more on his mind, and maybe he could talk to him about that later, he could tell just by looking at him that it was eating away at him, and all he could do was be there for him, give him what advice he could, try and comfort him, he would never be anything compared to what Kyle was, but he could try his best.

"It's not your fault, how can it be? I mean I'm not sick, Cartman's just fine, and I'm assuming Butters is too. You got the worst of it out the way, so don't think it's your fault."

Stan sighed once more, feeling a little defeated and he turned his head so he could meet the gaze of the blonde who luckily still had his hood pretty loose, at least he could have a decent conversation with him.

"I kissed him."

"Is this a dream? Or did you really?"

"Kenny, I'm serious, we kissed."

"But isn't that a good thing, I mean, how did he respond to that? Was it a good kiss? Was there tongue?"

"Kenny!"

"Sorry."

"And well he was the one who kissed me."

This made Kenny shift, and in one swift movement he was standing in front of Stan, holding his shoulders pretty firmly.

"Do you know what that means? It means he likes you, more than you think he does, it means you have nothing to worry about."

Stan frowned.

"He told me it was because of the dare, that's all."

"Just an excuse from him, he wanted to do it, but he didn't want to freak you out, maybe he knows you better than you think."

"He was drunk."

"Stan, stop trying to pass it off, most people make more sense when they are drunk, most gather up their courage to do something they couldn't if they were sober."

There was no way he could argue with that, Kenny made so much sense that it hurt, and it was as if the memory was coming back to him, crystal clear, feeling Kyle's soft lips against his own, the way he held gently to his top, and even though it only lasted seconds, he had his eyes closed, these details were not there before, but that was because he thought nothing of it, but now that Kenny had done his best to help with that he could see it, that kiss had to mean so much more.

There was a tug at his arm and Stan looked towards Kenny who was making his way for the bus that had pulled up seconds ago, he followed, even if his mind was working at a higher gear he continued.. now this was going to drag even more, and all he wanted to do was talk to Kyle, he could have skipped school and just spent his time talking with Kyle, but then again maybe a few hours at school would give Kyle some time to get better, if not fully then maybe just a little, enough to talk to him.

Wait a second.

"Did you say Cartman didn't get sick?"

Stan questioned as the two of them sat themselves down at the back of the bus, Kenny by the window, he nodded his head before he responded.

"He's fine, why?"

"Well, where is he?"

"Oh, he wanted to make it to school before everyone else, you know the whole deal about the picture he has.."

Kenny then chuckled after a moment of silence.

"He's not going to be happy when he finds out that Kyle's off, it's going to totally ruin his moment, that was the main reason he was doing it for."

Stan chuckled at the thought, it was true, at least if Eric did continue with his little show and tell at least Kyle could save on the embarrassment for today, he didn't need it, not now and not ever, and Stan didn't really care any more, Kenny for a fact didn't either.

Just as predicted, the day dragged slowly, the subjects were boring, the students were just as boring, the only entertainment both Stan and Kenny had was when Eric found out that Kyle was off, his fits of rage entertained the whole class and Mr. Garrison, although that soon ended when he told Eric to get on with his show and tell, and sure enough he showed the picture, and surprisingly no one cared, and Stan would never get the image of the three of them out of his head, in fact it was now his new favourite.

 **Hope you enjoyed this new chapter, there will be another very soon.**

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	7. Chapter Seven

**Just a quick warning to anyone reading, the chapter ahead contains boy x boy graphic sexy moments, if you are not into any of that then I'm sorry this will not be for you, and if that is what you are reading for then do continue and enjoy! ^^**

"Did you still want to come over or are you feeling a bit better now?"

Kenny questioned him, and Stan smiled, he would never be able to repay him for any of this, Kenny was there for him and maybe there was a small part of him that had taken him for granted, most of the time Kenny stayed quiet, he never really got involved unless it was something directly thrown at him from mainly Eric, or if he was involved in deciding what they would all be doing, but never before had he been so involved in helping Stan at least, and it was nice, he had always known he could trust him, but now more than ever he felt even closer to that.

"I'm feeling okay, I'll let you know if I need a guardian angel."

Stan joked with a smirk, Kenny grinned and nodded gently.

"Well, I'll be there if you do.. I'll see you later."

Parting ways Stan headed home, his phone in hand, just as he reached his door he composed a message.

'How you feeling?'

-Stan

He pressed send and hoped that Kyle would reply soon, of course if not he would have to wait a little longer, which did sound a little selfish, but he couldn't help it, it was just the way he felt, it was like a mixture of excitement, worry and joy, none of which he could control, it just sat there fluttering around within, it was enough to make you sick.

Stan had chicken dinner, which was nice, his parents spoke about their days, which most of it Stan blocked out the best he could, Shelly didn't say much, she looked just as bored as Stan had felt.

That was just over two hours ago and still no reply from Kyle.

Stan had been able to finish off his homework, even take a bath, there was still no reply, and he was starting to rethink things, this had to be what he passed to him, this was his fault that Kyle was so ill and to make things worse he couldn't stop his mind from wanting Kyle to just reply to him, it was all he wanted him to do, he wanted him to feel better more than anything, but he wanted him to reply so much more.

And when it was time, Stan got himself ready for bed, it was coming up to half ten, a little disappointed he dropped back and lay his head down to rest, his eyes shut tight as if trying to will himself to sleep, it was a little difficult when his mind was still going just as quickly as before, but then his room lit up and his phone went off, and just as he had hoped there was a message waiting for him and it was from Kyle.

'I'm feeling better thank you. Are you still awake?'

-Kyle

'Good, and yeah I'm awake, is it too late for you to call?'

-Stan

'Sorry I was going to ring earlier but I didn't think I would have slept this long, I can still call you if you like?'

-Kyle

'It's cool, and yeah.'

-Stan

As soon as Stan's message had been sent the incoming call came through, and even if they had done this many times before Stan felt nervous, it rang a few times before he finally answered.

"Hey."

"Hey, how was school?"

Kyle sounded so groggy, he could tell that he had not long woke up, and he could hear in his voice just how sick he was, even if he was telling him he was feeling better he could tell otherwise, Kyle got sick a lot, and Stan always knew the difference, there would be no denying it.

"Same old, I got your homework, it's pretty easy I finished it in an hour."

"More? We've only just had some."

"Yeah I think Garrison is trying to fuck with us again."

"When does that not happen?"

Stan chuckled and Kyle coughed a little on his end.

"Hey, will you be in tomorrow?"

"My Mom wants me to stay home again."

"Okay, well, when you are back, I really need to talk to you about something."

"Can't you tell me now?"

"I'd rather talk about it face to face."

Which was right, as much as it would be harder for him to tell him to his face it was the right thing to do, especially since he wanted to make sure everything he done was right, if there was any way it was going to work out for the better this was the right way to go about it.

"So come over."

Kyle caught him off guard and he continued his silence for a moment longer than he should have done.

"Stan? You still there?"

"Yeah, and what like right now?"

"Yeah why not? Never stopped you before, my Mom and Dad are in bed, Ike's fast asleep I'll do what I normally do and leave the door open."

It was much easier, and he had no idea when he could see him next, like he had promised himself he would not do it over the phone.

"I'll be there in ten minutes."

"Just come on up."

The phone cut off and Stan was up in seconds, grabbing his coat he put it over his Terrance and Phillip pajamas, he quickly brushed his hand through his hair and then defeated the motion by putting his hat on top, as soon as he had done that he put his phone into his pocket and was out of his bedroom, closing his door as quiet as he could save waking any one of his family up, and as soon as he was out the front door he took a breath of relief, he had made it this far, the worst was getting inside Kyle's and into his room without making a noise, that would be much worse than sneaking around his own house, he knew of course he would have Kyle's support but still..

Kyle's front door closed with ease, and luckily without noise, so that one out the way he made his way through the darkened living room and up the stairs, knowing which step to avoid and which step to be careful on, it was the same everytime he had done this, and from years of learning what made what noise it became second nature, even if his heart was in his chest it was always worth it.

Just as he placed his hand on Kyle's door he heard the toilet flush, turning his head towards the door his eyes widened a little and he dropped down low and hid himself behind the small stand which had a large houseplant on top of it, he had closed his eyes and grasped the top of his head, somehow comforting himself, he heard the door open, and the light turn off, he then heard every single step… and it was getting closer to him, his heart was racing, he was going to get into so much trouble for this, not only my Kyle's family but his own, now that's double the punishment.

"Dude?"

It came as a soft whisper, and Stan instantly recognized it as Kyle's voice, relief washed over him and he glanced up to Kyle, who was standing looking a little confused as to why Stan was down there in the first place.

The two of them got into Kyle's room, as soon as the door was shut the light went on.

"You know you would have been safer in my room."

Stan knew that of course, he just couldn't function properly at the thought of being caught out.

"I know, it just happened."

He told him shrugging it off with an amused smirk, to which Kyle smiled back, it was not as bright as normal, which Stan could understand, and now that he was focusing on him he could see how pale he was, and how dark his eyes looked, he even looked as though he was having difficulty standing up straight.

Just as Stan sat himself down on the red heads bed, Kyle joined him, putting his feet under the sheets and pulling his knees up to his chin, ever since he came down with this illness all he wanted to do was curl up and either sleep forever or just die, whichever came first and whichever was the easiest, of course none of them had been an option and he had been worse off in the past, but right now, he was reliving it.

"You look like hell."

Stan told him, and Kyle dropped his head a little, his hair dropping over his face, those beautiful little curls.. Stan reached forward and move one curl that was just over Kyle's eye.

"I kinda feel like it too."

Kyle replied sitting himself up a little he looked to Stan, who was watching him, giving him a small smile Stan responded, it was just a way to give them both a bit of hope.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

Kyle was already getting to the point, not because he was desperate for Stan to get on with it and just tell him, but he was genuinely curious as to how important it must be for him to want to speak face to face with him.

"I uh.."

Why was he freezing now? Why would it be this hard to speak to someone you have known for so long? To recognize them as your super best friend and now freeze up was not normal, no he needed to be strong, this was Kyle, there was no way he could lose him and if he lost him now he would do his best to get him back…

"I want to know something first."

Stan started again, this time he had confidence on his side, and he never left the gaze of Kyle, who was watching him curiously, he then nodded his head waiting for him to continue.

"What exactly did you hear that night in my room?"

Kyle was a little surprised that he was bringing up, but he still knew straight away what he was talking about.

"Why?"

"Please, just answer, I just need to know."

"But I don't understand why?"

"I'll explain, just answer."

Kyle could tell that Stan was getting a little frustrated, he put it down to it being really important to him, so that cut an argument there really quickly.

"You said you loved me."

He heard him say it? But there was nothing wrong with that he had told Kyle he loved him so many times, and heck Kyle had said to back to him, of course now Stan saw it completely differently because he was in fact in love with him…

Kyle picked up on his confusion straight away.

"Not just once."

He paused again, watching Stan, waiting to see if he understood what he was saying, and as of yet he hadn't picked up on it.

"Over.."

He rose his brows and shook his head a little, Stan still looked lost.

"And over…"

But that was still normal, Stan felt as though he was missing some big here, he knew what his dream had been about sure, but there was no way… Oh god.

"Jesus Christ Stan, you was telling me you loved me over and over until you moaned my name."

Just as Kyle had spelled it out for him Stan had already understood it, and he felt himself blush, instantly regretting asking in the first place, sure he wanted to know but now that he did he felt terrible for even going there, he couldn't help it sure, but still…

"I had no idea I'm sorry."

Kyle didn't understand what the apology was for but instead of pushing he changed it back to Stan original reason for coming here.

"Now can you tell me what you wanted to talk about?"

Kyle asked him.

He was a little unsure on how he was going to say it, how was he going to word it, and now in person it was even more difficult which he should have known already, it was not that normal for him.

"Look, I'm just going to come out and say it and before I do just give me a chance, just hear me out, don't throw me out just yet, I mean I hope you don't do that either way but just... Just listen."

Kyle didn't say anything, the only thing he did do was shift his position so that he could keep his concentration on Stan.

"I love you dude, and I don't mean I love you because you are my super best friend I mean I am in love with you, like I went to the highest point and fell, and dude I fell really hard and its killing me, I didn't want to keep it from you because that's how much its been killing me... Kyle I love you."

There was a moments silence between them and Stan felt as though his air was being cut off, now this was the point he needed Kyle to speak, to move to do something.

"You love me?"

"Yes."

"I don't know what to say."

"You don't need to say anything I just needed to tell you, if its going to make things weird between us then I can accept that I made it that way.."

"No Stan, I just mean I think that's how I feel about you."

Was he being serious?

"What?"

Stan felt like he once again couldn't function, his brain must have misinterpreted it, telling him what he wanted him to say, not what he actually said, there was no way it could have been possible, there was no way on this planet that he was that lucky to drop on something so amazing in an instant..

"Stan, you've always been there for me, no matter what had gone on, you were always at my side, the amounts of times you have saved my life both physically and mentally, I always knew that I had some form of connection to you, but you were you, there was no way I could tell you that because I was too scared the only person I could talk to about it was Kenny and..."

"Wait! Kenny knew how you felt?"

Kyle froze for a moment and then nodded his head, he felt like he was going to say something about the two of them keeping it from him, seeking comfort from him instead of just telling him.

"That clever bastard."

"Huh?"

Stan chuckled and rolled his head back a little to stare at the ceiling, this whole time, this whole time he knew, that must have been why he was so confident that nothing would go wrong.

"I've been talking about it to Kenny too, he kinda just figured me out."

Looking back towards Kyle he noticed how small and fragile he was looking, apart from that his head was down resting on his knees, he could just make out that he was crying from the soft sniffles he was making, had he said something wrong?

"Kyle?"

Stan moved himself so that he was sitting next to him, putting one arm on his shoulder to try and get a response, tilting his head a little he watched as Kyle lifted his own head, meeting his gaze he could see the stray tears slipping down the side of his face, and he felt his heart tear open, never did he like seeing him cry, he never wanted him to be in pain, he never deserved that.

"I'm sorry."

Kyle whispered through his sobs, sniffling once more, he looked like he was going to break into a million pieces, Stan shook his head and pulled Kyle over to him, pressing his head against his chest, holding him as close as he could, his one hand stroking the soft hairs on the back of his neck.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, and if you don't stop crying you are going to start me off."

He said making Kyle chuckle a little.

"I'm just scared, I've tried to be strong, god knows I've tried Stan."

"I know."

"I'm such a pussy."

Stan laughed quietly.

"Yeah, big one."

They remained where they were for a few moments, Stan still stroking the back of Kyle's neck whilst he finished off his tears, he could feel the front of his pajamas getting a little damp, but he dismissed it.

"Kyle?"

It broke the silence and Kyle pulled away from him so that he could look at him, there was a questioning look upon his face and Stan traced every part of that beautiful face, and before he knew what he was doing he had leaned in and pressed his lips to Kyle's and those soft lips moved away from his own, and he panicked, more so than he ever had done before, had he just rejected him?

"Stan, I'm sick, I don't want you to get ill again."

That was a relief.

"I'm the one who got you sick remember?"

That seemed to be enough because just as Stan had said it Kyle tugged at Stan's coat, bringing him back, their lips locking once more, this time Stan closed his eyes, at first they were both hesitant, but as soon as they felt right, they moved their lips together, this time the kiss lasted longer, and time was lost, neither knew how long they had been connected, but both needed some air, so the kiss broke, but their proximity remained, their foreheads pressed together, and Kyle had such a blissful smile on his lips, it was angelic.

"Stan?"

"Yeah?"

They moved back slightly, almost at the same time, Stan gazing questionably at Kyle, who was looking away from him, as if he was trying to pluck up his courage, which was exactly what he was doing, and he might as well come out and say it since everything else had been put out in the open, and then his eyes met Stan's.

"Can I do something?"

Stan nodded his head, he didn't need to ask him, he trusted whatever it was he wanted to do.

"Close your eyes."

Stan complied.

"No looking."

Kyle said grabbing the front of Stan's hat he pulled it down so that it covered his eyes, and Stan left him to it.

"Lie down."

Stan moved a little so that he could lie down, his head hitting Kyle's pillow, the butterflies were manically fluttering in his stomach, yet he remained calm, almost excited to find out what Kyle was up to, he could feel him moving beside him, and as soon as the movement stopped he felt Kyle's fingers trailing down the buttons on his pajamas, Stan didn't move, so Kyle proceeded to to undo them, one by one.. every time one popped open he glanced up to Stan's lips.. and once they were undone he leant forward and pressed one single kiss to his lips, both his hands pressing against Stan's bare chest, there was still no protest so he continued.. using his fingertips he traced them down over Stan's stomach, and he couldn't help but smile when Stan moved.

"That tickles."

Stan said sounding a little amused, and Kyle grinned, using one finger to run painfully slow along the line of the pajama pants.. and Stan sucked in a breath, letting it go just as quickly.. but still no movement to stop him.. everything Kyle was doing he made sure he was okay with it, and from his responses he was okay, that was good enough for him.

Stan was no sure what to expect, one thing he knew for sure was that each touch that Kyle gave him was making him go crazy, and in that sense he was aroused, he was already semi-hard and it made him flush.. had Kyle noticed that, he's been still for way too long now, he could still feel his fingers against his skin, but he had stopped moving, and as if on cue.

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course."

Stan answered straight away.

That's when Stan felt Kyle's fingers curl under and pull his pajamas down, it was slow, but as soon as he had done the cool air from the room hit him and now he could feel himself burning up… Kyle was quite, he was not moving again, and Stan felt more than exposed.

More time ran by and Stan couldn't hold it in.

"Kyle? Seriously, do or say something you're freaking me out."

Just as he was about to pull his hat away his hand was stopped by Kyle's.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.. I just.."

"You just what?"

"I've just never seen someone else's before, and you're uncircumcised too so it was a bit of a surprise."

"Jesus Christ Kyle you scared the shit outta me."

Kyle chuckled at Stan's response to him and leant back to press his lips to Stan's before he could carry on his words, and almost at the same time he took Stan's cock in his hand, and Stan moaned into his mouth, just that alone was enough to push his confidence to the top, and he hoped at least he could do something right, this was the first time he had done anything like this, sure he had touched himself, but this was Stan, how many times did he touch himself?

Kyle lost his thought track as Stan grabbed the back of his head to force the kiss a little deeper, and that gave Kyle the green light, he stroked his cock once, earning another moan, it sounded almost feral, so he continued that motion, and he felt Stan's hips start to move, the pace just automatically picked up, without even willing it to.

Moving himself away Kyle pressed a kiss to Stan's earlobe.

"Does it feel good?"

Kyle whispered to him, and Stan bit his bottom lip as Kyle's grip tightened around his cock, his pace quickening, Stan nodded in response, trying to keep himself from saying anything, he had no idea if he could trust his voice.

"Is this better than your dream?"

"Oh fuck.. Kyle yes."

"I love you Stan."

Kyle whispered, and that was it, Stan lost his mind, he felt as though he was blacking out, the shots of pleasure that ran through him shook his body, and Kyle carried on his motion until Stan's head dropped to the side, his breaths heavy..

"I love you too…"

Stan finally said, Kyle had sat up letting Stan go.

"Oh god."

Stan pulled his hat up, leaving it messily on the top of his head and looked to Kyle who was glancing down, following his gaze he pushed himself up onto his elbows, his cum was everywhere, not only was it on Kyle's hand, it was on his own stomach, on his pajamas and on Kyle's bed.

They looked towards each other and started laughing a little too loud, and they realized it because as soon as they did they both pressed their hands to their mouths silencing themselves.

Luckily Kyle's being ill had an upside, there was a box of tissues next to his bed, reaching over he grabbed it and first wiped his hand off, dropping the tissue on his side, handing some to Stan they both cleaned up, Stan readjusting himself, he lay himself back down, his pajamas done up, and Kyle stood with a wobble, feeling a little dizzy, it soon passed and he disposed of the tissues, and whilst he was up he switched the light off, leaving the two in the darkness of the night.

Pulling the covers apart Kyle jumped in, lifting them slightly so that Stan could join him, before he did he took his coat and hat off throwing them to the bottom of Kyle's bed.

"I wasn't exactly expecting that."

Stan spoke first, causing Kyle to shift a little, he assumed he was looking at him, but he kept his eyes towards the window.

"Sorry, I'm not exactly sure why I did it myself, I only wanted to touch you, and well.."

"You did just that."

Stan said with a soft laugh.

"You don't mind do you?"

Stan shook his head.

"No, was too good, I never knew you could do that."

"I've only ever done it once to myself, I took it as the same kind of thing, just on someone else."

"How are you feeling?"

Stan turned his head so that he could look at him, but it was too dark, he could just about see his outline.

"Feeling a little tired, not feeling as sick though, so that's a bonus."

Kyle replied, and Stan smiled into the darkness.

"Good, I think it's best I go."

Silence.

"Kyle?"

"Yeah?"

"I won't lose you will I?"

"As long as I don't lose you then no, never."

 **I do hope you enjoyed reading ^^**

 **I am certainly enjoying writing this fiction, and this is not the end.. a new chapter will be up as soon as possible! And once again, thank you to all who are reading! (:**


	8. Chapter Eight

**Really hope you are enjoying ^^ There will be some twists pretty soon, and my brain won't get rid of it unless I write it, so, we shall see how that turns out! :L**

That itself was confirmation for both of them, each had their own worries and their concerns about how this was going to affect their friendship, and from this point all they could do was take it one step at a time, see where it goes, see how it would all turn out, as long as they had each other then that was all that mattered..

Stan had successfully got out of Kyle's house, Kyle had told him he would try and get into school tomorrow, if not Stan told him to rest and he would speak to him later, either way they would be in contact some how.

His phone went off as he reached his own house, a new message from Kyle.

'Thank you for telling me. Goodnight Stan and get some sleep.'

-Kyle

'And thank you Kyle ;P But seriously, thank you for listening and opening up to me too, goodnight dude. Feel better.'

-Stan

Closing the message he realized there was one message he had missed, opening it up he found it was off Wendy..

'Where was you at recess? I waited but you never turned up, are you doing this on purpose? I only wanted to talk to you.'

-Wendy

He had completely forgot, his mind had been elsewhere and Wendy had completely slipped from him, now that confirmed it, he was the worst person on the planet, he was still with Wendy… and he had just recieved a handjob from his super best friend/love of his life… he may not have been interested in her as much as he had thought he was but still she did not deserve any of that, even if she was going to break it off with him, he just made himself look bad, even if she didn't know about it, Stan knew, and Kyle.. he couldn't help but feel as though he was going against him too, no there was no way he could keep that up.

'Wendy, I'm sorry I lost track, want to meet today? Just let me know when and where.'

-Stan

It was already past midnight when he had left Kyle's so the new day had begun.. and Stan needed to make things right.

The night itself passed by a lot quicker, and once again Stan felt as though he had gone without sleep again, he knew he must have had some kind of sleep because he felt so groggy, it took all his might to get out of bed and get himself ready for school, his breakfast was pancakes, he had as much as he could before he left for the bus stop, just as much was on his mind as before, he thought it would have made some kind of difference, but now there was too much to think about, the main thing he wanted to sort today was Wendy, make sure that everything was over and done with out the way the rest would come after the next, well he hoped it would anyway.

Watching his feet in the snow he neared the bus stop, he could just about make out some voices, one of them he instantly recognized from the venom lacing his words as Eric, the other being a soft mumble of a reply, that was Kenny, he couldn't hear him from where he was but he knew it must have been something out of annoyance by his tone, and then there was a third, looking up from his feet he spotted Wendy, not the person she was wanting to see this early in the morning, but that wasn't what made him perk up, it was when he noticed Kyle standing at the bus stop, he smiled to himself and carried on walking, and Kyle didn't even acknowledge him, he looked sullen and very distant..

Before he had a chance to even say 'Hi' the bus turned up, and Wendy had claimed his arm, tugging it she pulled him onto the bus, instantly finding them both a seat, he knew that she was talking, he could just about hear her voice, but his eyes were towards Kyle, who not once looked at him, and he had a feeling as to why that was, Eric sat himself down in front of Stan and Wendy, spreading himself out as much as possible, and then Kyle and Kenny sat themselves in front of Eric, he felt so far away from Kyle.

"Stan? Are you even listening to me or am I just talking for no reason."

He had been broke from his thought pattern, and that annoyed him, down to that he turned to face Wendy, a frown had formed and he sighed.

"Look, Wendy I really don't care, so yes you are talking for no reason."

It came out a little harsher than he had wanted it to, but he was telling the truth he really didn't care, it had passed that point.. Standing up he left the shocked female and stopped a row in front of Kyle and Kenny, luckily the bus was not as full so the seat next to Butters was free.

"Mind if I sit here?"

"Not at all Stan take a seat."

Butters said cheerfully.

"Thanks."

Even as he had glanced to Kyle, there was nothing in return, he was turned away from him and looking out the window, he could tell he was ignoring him because he wasn't even talking with Kenny, however Kenny did acknowledge him with a sorry looking smile, to which he returned.. Instead of facing that head on he pulled his phone out, quickly typing a message in he sent it to Kyle.

'Morning, how you feeling?'

-Stan

It was short and simple, he was not exactly sure how to approach him, so maybe it would trigger it off on it's own.

"You know I got grounded again."

Butters' voice called through to him, and Stan lifted his head so that he could see him, that was certainly nothing new.

"What happened this time?"

"I was supposed to have been home that night we were at Eric's, and I fell asleep on the couch, I kinda wish I'd have gone home before any of that now, a whole month ."

His voice sounded a little like it was about to crack, but he still could manage a smile in Stan's direction, if only it was that easy, if only he was a little bit more like Butters, no matter how much negativity that went on in the little blondes life he still was able to see the positive, no matter how small, and he couldn't help but admire him for it.

He knew Butters was still talking, but he couldn't focus on his words, he was looking towards his phone, there was no messages, and now that the bus had pulled up everyone was making their way off, and Stan followed just behind Kenny, Kyle leading the three of them.

"Kyle?"

It caught his attention because he stopped, but was looking towards his feet, and Stan's heart dropped.

"I'll see you in class."

That was all he said before continuing for the doors, Stan was stuck in place, his gaze on the empty spot where Kyle was standing, he felt a cool rush run through him and then he felt numb, he couldn't understand it, they would always talk, every time there was something wrong, even if they had to force it out of one another, but this time felt different, there was something more than just wrong and this was going to eat at him.

"S'up with you? Had an argument with your lover?"

Eric said as he stepped up just beside Stan.

"Shut the fuck up."

Stan returned with venom lacing his words, and Eric seemed genuinely shocked, his brows raised and he looked over to Kenny who was shaking his head at him.

"You could have just said yes."

Eric shouted to Stan who was slamming the school door shut behind him, Kenny rolled his eyes and turned away from him, making his own way for the door, now by this point Eric was a little confused, it was the first time he had really spoke to any of them, so how many sticks did they all have up their ass this time?

"What did I do?"

Eric called to Kenny who flipped him off before disappearing in side.

"Who knows what you did, you're not the only one that happened to."

Eric turned just to see Wendy standing to his right.

"Yeah but you're a girl Wendy, that don't count."

"Fuck you."

"Whatever this time I'm the one walking away, screw you Wendy, I'm goin' to school."

Eric said heading straight inside, at least he had managed to get out of that one, he still had a soft spot for her, so instead of getting caught up in that it was best to put on the front and get away as soon as possible, it's foolproof.

Opening up his locker he grabbed a few things, stuffing them into his bag, everyone must be menstruating today, he sighed and shut his locker, dropping his bag over his shoulder he turned to walk away.

"Eric?"

Eric rolled his eyes and continued to walk down the hall, Butters caught up easily.

"What do you want Butters?"

"Well Eric, I'm pissed off."

Eric frowned and stopped walking so that he could look at him did he really just say that, Butters didn't turn, he shifted a little on his spot before he continued.

"Sorry, I mean.. well, Kyle just told me to go away and leave him alone."

"Butters, everyone tells you to go away and leave them alone so what's the problem?"

Eric questioned him leaning himself against the wall next to the bathroom.

"Well he was crying and I only wanted to see if he was okay… I don't like seeing people cry.. poor lil' guy, he looked so sad."

"So why does that piss you off? I wish you'd make sense Butters."

"Oh that.. my Mom says it to my Dad sometimes to get his attention, it just slipped out."

Eric sighed and raised his brows.

"So was there a point to any of this?"

"Well I just thought you'd wanna know if one of your friends was upset…"

"Bit of misuse of words there Butters."

There was a moment of silence as Butters looked like his gears were grinding together trying to figure out what it was Eric meant by that, and since it dragged on a little too long Eric shook his head and started to walk off from the blonde, but there was something he caught just as he was stepping away from him, it had been muttered so he had difficulty, turning back quickly he grabbed Butters and pushed him against the wall causing the smaller male to yelp in shock.

"Ow.. Eric.. what was that for?"

"Butters, what did you just say?"

"I was asking you what you done that for.."

"No! Before that, you said something about Stan and Kyle. What did you say?"

He gripped him a little tighter.

"Eric, you're hurting me…"

"Butters, tell me.."

"I just said that something must have happened after the kiss… but I didn't say anything because I don't know if that was real or not, I had some really strange and some really scary dreams that night.."

"Kiss? What kiss?"

"Between Stan and Kyle."

"Butters why the hell didn't you mention this earlier.. where's Kyle?"

Eric let him go and Butters rubbed at his left shoulder, wincing slightly at the touch, Eric was already starting to walk away from him, his gaze on Butters waiting for him to respond.

"He was heading for the gym… but wait Eric, I swear it must have been a dream… Eric?! You'll be late for class."

Eric was out of earshot now that he had his planned destination set in his head, and heck, he had far more important things going on now, much more important than getting into class, getting himself to Kyle was his first priority, close second was manipulating that little jewish mind, of course just for some more answers, if Butters was telling the truth then maybe this was more than just a dream, heck this was gold, he would be able to wrap him around his little finger, and that opportunity would be stupid to pass off.

Just as Eric reached the gym doors the bell rang letting everyone know it was time for class, and of course he ignored it… he opened the door and stepped inside, and sure enough he spotted Kyle sitting at the back, he straightened himself up and sucked in a deep breath before releasing it and calming himself down, making sure he put on the best 'i'm you're best friend now tell me what's wrong' face.. such a good faker.

"Oh my god Kaahl.. what's wrong?"

Eric questioned as soon as he reached him, he perched himself on a seat facing Kyle, who had his head in his arms resting them against his knees.

"Fuck off Cartman, I'm not in the mood."

It came out a little muffled, but Eric still caught what he said.

"Oh don't be like that, I'm skipping class just for you."

This time there was movement and Kyle sat up, his eyes were red from crying and he looked paler than normal, something really had screwed with him, not that he cared either way…

"Yeah and that just makes it suspicious, whatever you've got to say just say it."

"Aside from you looking like such a pussy right now.. I'm being seriously, I wanna know what's up."

Fluttering his lashes he smiled a little, his gaze never left Kyle and Kyle frowned at him, there was no way he could fall for it, there was always something behind it..

"Nothing, I'm just not feeling well."

"Bullshit."

It came out a little louder than Eric had intended, and he caught Kyle jump, which made him internally laugh to himself…

"What the fuck has it got to do with you? And even if it is bullshit what do you care anyway? You've never fucking cared about anything but yourself, so what is it you want this time? Or do you just want to humiliate me? Do what you want because I am beyond caring at this point.."

"No need to get pissy with me because your boyfriend rejected your kisses."

It was a good tact he believed, and it was easily confirmed because Kyle went bright red and his eyes went wide.

"Wha.. what the hell are you talking about?"

"I saw you kiss Stan."

He lied.

And he brought it, Kyle was even redder than before if that was possible.

"You saw that? I was drunk it didn't mean anything."

It hurt him to lie about it, but this was Cartman.

"It was in my house, I see everything."

He pushed further and Kyle dropped his head back down into his arms.

"Yeah well do your worst Cartman, just get it over and done with. I just want to be alone."

Maybe this was going to be a little harder than he had thought.

Eric stood himself up and stared down at Kyle, his head cocking slightly, his mind rushing with ideas, plans, anything and everything.

"What if I started telling people what I saw?"

This made Kyle meet his gaze, and he shook his head, was those fresh tears he could see?

"Don't you fucking dare."

"I thought it didn't mean anything Kahl? If it didn't mean anything then what's the problem?"

This time Kyle stood up, his gaze intensified and he stood face to face with Eric, his gaze never wavering, Eric felt a rush go through him…

"You would destroy everything… and I know, I really know how fucking much you would love to do that, just to see it destroy me, but you are not doing that to Stan… you do anything that makes him unhappy then I will break your fucking legs."

Eric couldn't help but widen his eyes, had he just threatened him? At least he could admit to himself that he sent a chill down his spine, he got some kind of kick seeing Kyle so aggressive…

Eric smirked.

"You're totally gay for him aren't you? Perfect."

"Perfect? How the fuck is that perfect?"

"Oh so you don't argue the fact, do go on Kahl, you're just adding to it."

"Fuck you.. you fat piece of shit.."

"I'd watch your mouth kike… I think I might just use that one, keep your boyfriend happy right? Sure I can do that, as long as you're my bitch Kahl.. it's not going to be like before, oh no! One slip up and I will destroy both you and your boyfriend.."

Kyle was lost, he already felt so much regret, especially now, Stan needed to remain happy, he needed to have a life with Wendy, something normal, Kyle couldn't give him anything like that, he just couldn't… And if giving Stan his happiness meant destroying everything else, then so be it… Stan deserved so much more.

"Deal?"

Eric held out his hand.

Kyle needed to protect Stan, in anyway he could...

 **Thank you for all the favs ^^ It would be amazing to hear from you! (:  
Will update very soon! (:**


	9. Chapter Nine

**Oops! So the last upload was a fail! Thank you guys for letting me know! That'll teach me for uploading so late at night! :L**

Stan's eyes glanced towards the clock on the wall, it was nearly ten o'clock.. There was no sign of Kyle, and since he had said that they would see each other in class it did start to worry him, that plus the fact that Eric was also missing, that was never a good sign.

And he was getting pretty sick of telling Garrison that he had no idea where they were, if he knew then he wouldn't have been sitting where he was.

Finally watching the clock payed off, and it was time for recess.

"Kenny? Have you seen Kyle?"

"I've not seen him since we got off the bus."

"You guys..? You guys I really need to talk to you…"

Both Kenny and Stan turned to look towards Butters who was just squeezing through the door.

"What is it?"

Kenny questioned him when he was beside them, glancing around Butters nodded towards the bathroom, they followed and once inside Butters turned his attention to them, only for a few seconds before he turned himself away.. twiddling his thumbs he started.

"I have done something really bad."

"Butters, just tell us."

Stan pushed this time.

"I told Eric that I saw you and Kyle kiss, but I didn't mean to because I didn't know he could hear me, and, well I thought it was a dream so I didn't think it really mattered, Stan I am really sorry, now that they didn't turn up I got really scared… oh jeez if my parents found out about this I would be grounded for even longer for spreading gossip…"

"Butters, where did they go?"

"I told Eric that Kyle was in the gym."

"Thanks Butters, come on let's see if they are still there."

Stan said, as soon as they left Butters followed, Stan was desperate to find him, he wanted to know why he was giving him the cold shoulder.. there was no way he could just ignore it because he couldn't understand what it was he had done, if he had even done anything, Kyle was never like this unless there was a reason behind it.

"Had he said anything to you Kenny?"

"He needed to tell you something but that was the last thing he said to me."

"He was fine when I left him last night. I don't understand what happened. How did he seem when he said that?"

Kenny let his mind wander for a moment or too, trying to gather his thoughts, as they continued to the gym Kenny shrugged, his head shaking a little.

"He didn't seem like himself, but when he saw you and Wendy he got worse."

He maybe understood it a bit more, and of course he had reason, since Stan thought that Wendy was going to be breaking up with him, but instead she seemed to be trying to stick with him more than usual, which was strange because she usually stayed alongside her friends, maybe giving Stan a quick kiss or some form of contact every now and again, so there must have been something going on there, she was probably having an argument with Bebe again.

As soon as they reached the gym, there was a loud crash… the three looked toward each other and Stan yanked the door open, the three stepped inside to see Kyle standing over Eric who was motionless below him, Kenny reacted first, telling Butters to guard the door, Stan had froze but the tug on his arm from Kenny caused his own brain to get into action, both of them rushed to his side, Stan pulled an emotionally compromised Kyle away from Eric..

"Fuck you Cartman.. you manipulating piece of shit…"

"Kyle?"

"Fuck you.. I fucking hate you.."

"Kyle, stop."

Stan said trying to hold Kyle away, he was seemingly a little stronger in his rage filled quest to beat Eric, but Stan's adrenaline was pumping, giving a new sense of strength, which seemed to be helping.

Kenny on the other hand was knelt down beside Eric, who from what he could see was still breathing, but the lump and blood on the side of Eric's head was a little worrying.

"You piece of shit… you're fucking nothing.. you're nothing.."

"Kyle? Kyle? Please.. stop.."

Kyle fell silent and his head dropped onto Stan's shoulder, his muffled cries were heartbreaking, Stan could feel him slipping to the floor, even as he held him, so he fell down with him, holding him in his arms, he could feel tears irritating his own eyes, he had never seen him like this before, normally he was so strong, Kyle had always been strong which had always made Stan strong, without that Stan felt weak, just as he was feeling right now because he had no idea what to do to make things right, he didn't know what had happened to start this.

"I don't know what to do."

Stan heard him whimper into his coat, and that just made his hold on him tighten, Eric must have been waking up because he could hear Kenny telling him to take it easy.

"Kyle, what the hell happened? Tell me what happened?"

Silence fell between them and the commotion in the background was ignored.

"You deserve to be happy. Wendy makes you happy! That's what you need."

Stan frowned and pulled Kyle away slightly so that he could look at him, Kyle didn't meet his gaze but Stan ignored that fact and carried on.

"Where is that coming from?"

"Stan.. I told my Mom what I done.."

"What? Why?"

"Because if I didn't do it then, then I would have been scared to ever tell her. Stan I panicked.. I shouldn't be feeling like this, I shouldn't be doing things that would compromise your happiness with Wendy, I shouldn't be selfish when it comes to wanting you in my life as more than just my super best friend…"

"Kyle, what was the last thing I asked you last night?"

Kyle rubbed at his already red eyes, his gaze shifted and he was staring into Stan's, and then he shrugged his shoulders.

"I asked you about losing you if I would lose you.. I didn't as you that just because I felt like asking it, I asked you that because it would be the last thing I would want, if I lost you in anyway Kyle, then I would lose myself, you are the only person that makes me happy, you are the only person I want to make me happy, and if you think it's selfish to wanting me in your life then I want to be just as selfish and want you in my life, with no one to stop me… I let you do what you done because I wanted that, I wanted you, I don't want anything or anyone else and what you have done today has killed me, that is like losing you, and if you don't talk to me about it then it's even worse… what did your mom say?"

Stan questioned him changing the subject so that he could learn a little bit more as to why Kyle was so upset, he knew the most part and yes he felt terrible, but at the same time he was angry that Kyle had not told him directly.

"We had an argument."

Kyle said looking away.

"She's upset with me, she said I was too young, and I was confused, I snapped at her and left the house early.. I think she's disappointed, and I think she hates me."

Kyle looked as though he was going to break again, so Stan hugged him tight, then came a tap on Stan's shoulder, he turned to see Kenny standing beside him.

"Butters went to get Mackey and Garrison, because Cartman's not looking good, I think he might have concussion or something, Butters and I decided we would just say that Cartman fell off one of the chairs, I don't think at the moment he actually knows what's going on, he's pretty out of it."

At the mention both Stan and Kyle glanced over to Eric, who was sitting up against one of the chairs, his head was resting to the side, and his eyes were flickering open and shut very slowly.

"Oh shit, I didn't mean to go that far, I swear, I just..."

Kyle said, before Stan interrupted him.

"I'm not sure what he said to you, but whatever it was he deserved what came to him."

The three of them fell silent, and just as Kenny was about to say something the doors to the gym opened, and Butters entered followed by Mackey and Garrison, who by the looks of things both knew as much as they should, because Garrison was dealing with Cartman whilst Mackey made his way across to Stan and Kyle.

"Boys, my office now, all of you, no dawdling M'kay."

 **Just want to apologize to you all for such a long wait!I have been pretty busy! And I really didn't think this story was that popular, but the amount of feedback I have received has really given me confidence! Thank you for the new favs, and thank you for your time! I will try and keep up with updating the chapters! I hope you enjoy! (:**


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